Page 13 of Doubting Hearts

He moaned softly, his breath tickling my inner ear, and at that erotic sound my cock jerked in his hand and I flooded my jeans. I leaned my forehead against his, gasping and feeling a little better. We both stood there, hands still clasping each other’s spent cocks, whilst our breathing got back to normal. Finally, I pulled my hand away from him, wiping it on my jeans. Toby stepped back, his face flushed, looking much like mine probably was, satiated and rosy. He wiped his hands on his boxer shorts, pulled them back up, then fastened his trousers. I rearranged my underwear and did my jeans up. We looked at each other.

“Well, that was quick but fun,” Toby said softly. “I guess it was a start.”

“Start to what?” My brow furrowed. I hoped he wasn’t going to say “relationship.” I definitely wasn’t ready for that.

“To whatever this is that we’ve got going. Even you have to admit there’s a definite… spark between us.”

I felt a little relieved. “Oh, there’s a definite spark. More like a bloody flare, I’d say. Hopefully this is the first of many such encounters, when we get the chance.” My tone was wry as I grinned.

Toby laughed softly. “Yup. This—” He waved a hand at the inside of the shed. “—this is nice. It’ll do in a pinch.”

I pulled him to me, kissing him a little more softly this time. His mouth tasted of chocolate and coffee and mint. “Yes, indeed,” I whispered into his ear as his lips nuzzled my neck. “It will do very well.”

* * *

THE NEXT two weeks we managed a lot more encounters in the shed, virtually daily, all hot, pulsing action, from jerking each other off to blowjobs, at which Toby was very good. He knew how to suck me off and made sure he made the most of me when he had me in his mouth. I think he felt the same about my blowjobs, judging from the squeaks and expletives that came out of his beautiful and very dirty mouth. But we still never found the time to properly fuck. I wanted so much to feel myself inside him, feel those muscles of his clench around me and bring me to orgasm.

I wanted to own him, hear him shout my name as I pounded his arse. We tried to be circumspect, and while people knew we were interested in each other, we never made our little sessions obvious.

I felt possessive about this man, and that wasn’t my usual style at all with someone I’d just met and only wanted to use as a fuck buddy. It worried me a little. But I needn’t have worried because I managed to screw it up a few days later.

We’d just had a particularly good workout in the shed, and both of us were leaning against the wall of the hut, gasping, trousers around ankles.

“Christ, that was intense,” Toby panted as he got his breath back. “I swear those lips of yours get better every time you suck me off, Rain.”

I nodded in satisfaction at his words. “Practice makes perfect, Toby.

And we’re certainly getting enough of that.”

Toby leaned down awkwardly and pulled up his trousers. “Perhaps we could do something different for a change?” he said wistfully. “Go on a real date sometime instead of just quickies in the shed? Get to know each other a little better?” He zipped himself up and looked at me hopefully.

I felt a thrill of unease down my spine. That sounded too much like a real relationship thing to do. “Don’t you like this, then?” I waved a hand around the shed. “I’m quite happy doing what we’re doing. Why spoil it?” He went still. “Spoil it?” The quietness in his voice should have warned me he was annoyed. I’d seen it when he was tackling issues with recalcitrant staff and tradesmen at the hotel, and a quiet Toby was a dangerous one. But I plowed ahead anyway.

“Well, we have a good thing going here. We both get our rocks off and go home happy.”

He nodded, and this time I saw the flint in his eyes. “I see. So this is as far it goes?” He waved around the shed. “BJ’s and jack offs? You don’t really want to get to know me?”

I heard the evenness in his tone, and I swallowed. “Well, I didn’t know you wanted anything more, Toby. But now I do—”

He shook his head wearily. “Don’t worry, Rain. It’s all right. I should have known better.” The resignation in his voice made my chest wrench. I watched as he tightened his tie, made sure he looked presentable, and then without a backward glance, he was gone. I wanted to go after him, but my trousers were pooled around my ankles, and with the shuffling about, one leg had caught in an old lawnmower blade. I cursed and tried to untangle the fabric, but it took a while. By the time I had my dignity restored and my pants up, Toby had disappeared into the bowels of the hotel.

I wandered over into the Canterbury Bar to see Lucas carrying a piece of glossy cherrywood on his shoulder. He raised an eyebrow when he saw me.

“Where the hell did you get to?” he said aggrievedly. “I’ve been bloody humping this stuff around by myself for half an hour. You might be the boss, Rain, mate, but that doesn’t mean you can slack off.”

I scowled. “I had some business to do in the office. I’m sorry I wasn’t here.”

He nodded, but he didn’t look as if he believed me. “Uh-huh. Well, get your arse into gear and give me a hand.”

I did what I was told. It was much later that evening when I went to try and find Toby. I saw Chris, his night manager, wandering around with a plate of what looked like strawberries and cream. I walked up to him, and he nodded.

“Hey, Rain. You’re here late. What’s up?”

“Lucas and I had a load of timber to offload, ready for tomorrow. Err, have you seen Toby?”

He looked uncomfortable. “Toby went to the movies tonight with some guy he met last week. The guy was all over him earlier.” He looked at me curiously. “I thought you and he were, you know, seeing each other?”

I shrugged. “It’s nothing set in stone. We’re both free agents.” I said the words, but I didn’t like the idea at all of Toby being with someone else right now, especially someone who was “all over him.”