Page 139 of The Bartender Special

Benny slowed to a stop a few feet from him.

“You quit what? The pageant?”

Jack shook his head. He motioned between them. He was angry. Benny didn’t understand why.

“This. Us.” He shook his head again. “It's not working out for me anymore. And I-I can’t.”

“What do you mean?” Benny felt his face go hot. “I don't understand. What happened in there? Did Carol say something?”

“No. It’s not her. It’s…It’s not that.”

“She must have said something,” Benny tried. His stomach tightened. “I mean one second we're fine and now you’re⁠—”

Jack took a step toward him, stopping just short.

“I read the blog post,” he interrupted. The anger in his voice drained as he continued. “I read the blog post, Benny. The one you wrote five months ago.”

Benny blinked.

Jack didn't need to explain which post he was talking about.

He knew.

Of course, he knew.

The post that had taken The One Who Said Nothing into the stratosphere and had everyone interested asking: Who was Guy?

Jack ran a hand through his hair.

“I-I can't compete with that, Benny. I can't compete with Marcus. I can’t pretend to be Guy, not when he’s here.” Jack put his hand to his chest. His voice softened. Hurt thronged through every word. “You've known me for two weeks. But him? You've loved him since you were seventeen. And I think it's time you told him. Finally do something about it. Not just hide behind me.”

Benny felt like he was trying to mentally walk down a very steep hill on stilts he’d somehow felt confident enough before to put on.

There was no comfortable footing now.

No purchase that guaranteed he wouldn’t fall.

That he wouldn’t hit the ground.

That he wouldn’t hurt.

“You want me to tell Marcus?” he couldn't help but repeat. “You don’t—You don’t want me to hide behind you?”

He was slow with it but Jack nodded.

“I think you have to. Yeah.”

“And because you think I love him, you want to end our arrangement?”

Jack hit his chest and let his hand ball into a fist at his side after.

“Dammit, Benny. I don't want this to be an arrangement at all. And that's why I can’t⁠—”

“I don't want this to be an arrangement either.”

The words came out before Benny could stop them.

No overthinking.