Page 56 of Tempting Her Viscount

She hadn’t thought she cared about her reputation. She was a widow, freed to do as she pleased. But it was one thing not to have to worry about being ruined and yet another to have her name bandied about the ton as nothing more than a mistress with a title.

“What is it, Celia?”

“Have you told anyone?” she asked, her voice quiet and breathy.

“Told anyone what?”

“About us? About what we’ve done?”

He stood straighter. “Of course not. I mean, Gray obviously knows but he certainly won’t tell anyone else.”

She relaxed. She should have known Kit would keep her confidences. But clearly that was not common of the other willing men.

“I’ve changed my mind,” she announced as if he was following along with the thoughts in her head. His perplexed expression proved that wasn’t the case. “I don’t want to go through with it. I don’t want a lover. I don’t want a line of men at my door waiting their turn to warm my bed. I wanted freedom. I wanted to select the men myself, not just be the next inn to stay for the night along their journey.”

Kit brushed her cheek. “I’m sorry I’ve upset you. I shouldn’t have been so blasé about the matter.”

“I’ve always appreciated that you speak the truth even if it’s inappropriate to do so.”

“I’m not sure if that was a compliment.”

“It was meant as such,” she assured him.

He nodded. Then ran a hand through his hair, making a few of the golden strands stick out. She wanted to smooth them down but to touch him right then might lead to other touching. Not that they hadn’t done more than touch in a garden before.

“You don’t want anyone in town to know,” Kit said, coming to stand in front of her again. “Then we leave town.”

“Leave? Where would we go?”

“To my home in Scotland. It is large enough that you might find who you’re looking for, but far enough from London that you’ll not be exposed.”

“You actually want to help me with this?” she questioned.

She thought he might wait her out, hoping she would give in to his request to marry.

Originally, she’d not wanted to consider marriage to Kit because he’d left her when she’d needed him. But it was unfair to judge someone of that age for not wanting to wed. He hadn’t been ready, and who knows what would have happened if he’d married her then. He might have grown to resent her. Instead of being great friends as they were now, they could have hated one another.

Still, part of her worried he’d only asked her because he hadn’t found anyone else and she was comfortable. For that reason, she’d promised herself not to take him up on his offer. When the time came that he married, he deserved to do so for nothing other than love.

She understood that most marriages of peers were the result of a need and a resolution, be it money or a name. But Kit had shed off his debts and was free to find happiness, not simply an alliance.

She wanted that for him.

Kit glanced away and nodded once. She recognized the look on his face as determination.

“Yes. I’ll help you. While I would rather take you to my home to marry you, I understand why that is not an option at this time. But be assured, I don’t do this for truly unselfish reasons.”

“Then what are your reasons?”

Straightening his shoulders, he looked her in the eye.

“My wish is that after you’re permitted your freedom you might decide you’re ready to settle down with one man, and I hope to be that man. After all, every rogue gets tired eventually be they man or woman.” He winked.

“And if my freedom only makes me more determined to keep it? And I don’t tire of it?”

“Then I will give up with the knowledge that I helped a friend achieve her dreams.”

She hugged him. “You are the very best friend, Christopher.”

She felt his lips against her temple in the place she was marked differently from everyone else and vowed silently to do all that was in her power to return the gift and find the perfect woman for Kit.

As soon as possible.