Page 35 of His Secret Highland Bride

Shane wanted nothing more than to tuck his wife away in the cottage so he could track down the men who’d frightened her, but as he kissed her trembling hand, he knew he needed to stay with her. Going off to fight had been the wrong choice before. He’d not make the same mistake again.

It was in that moment when giving up what he wanted in exchange for what she needed that he realized how dear she’d come to be to him. He’d thought only to provide tangible things like food, clothing, and a safe place to rest her head. Now he felt more than just a duty. Things he wouldn’t have thought he had left to give again. When she called upon him, he’d been there for her rather than give in to rage and guilt.

Marriage, he had learned, was not to be one-sided. Growing up like he did, with his father fawning over Deirdre’s every whim, dressing her in the latest fashions, and gifting her with gems they couldn’t afford, he’d expected to give everything and get little in return. But he’d been lucky both times. Even now, he could tell Lindsay wanted him as much as he wanted her. Though he was surprised to see the fierceness of her need after the events of the morning. He would have expected that after being frightened, she wouldn’t want any man’s touch.

He’d been wrong. Her hands still trembled as she reached for the belt at his waist, but he didn’t consider stopping her. There’d been times in France after a particularly close call that he’d needed to know he was alive. Lindsay had done that for him after a year of feeling dead inside.

“I need ye,” she whispered against his bare chest after he’d pulled off his shirt.

He kissed her. “I’ll make sure you have everything you need.”

She smiled back and then slid down to her knees to take him into her warm mouth, shocking him enough to pull away.

“Where the devil did you learn such a thing?” he asked his innocent wife. He’d known she’d been innocent, had seen the evidence of it on their linens. But this was not a skill of a virgin bride.

“You don’t like it?” She tilted her head to the side. “I once saw a maid doing it to a man in the stables, and he seemed to like it. But if you don’t…”

He blinked himself back into his right mind. Had he just stopped her? “Bloody hell,” he murmured under his breath before attempting to fix the mess he’d made. “I do like it. I didn’t think it was something a wife did—more that it was done by…” He couldn’t very well say the word “whore” in front of his wife, especially not implying she was doing the act of one. That would be no way to ever have her do it again.

“It’s wrong?” she asked, hurt clear on her face.

He couldn’t shake his head enough. He feared it would pop off from his neck. “Nay. Nothing is wrong between us. So long as we both agree to it and it makes us happy, it is allowed.”

“Did…?” She stopped speaking and bit her lip, but he didn’t need her to finish her thought to know where it had been. Had Maria done such a thing? He’d been doing a fair job of not thinking of his late wife while in bed with his present one, but it seemed Lindsay still worried.

“What we do together is between us alone. Do you understand? It must be that way.”

She nodded. “Did what I was doing a moment ago make you happy?”

Christ, the lass would kill him. “It made me very happy. So long as it makes you happy, we could…” He gestured dumbly with his hand at his groin.

“We could stop discussing it and get back to it?” she said with a saucy smile on her swollen lips.

“Aye,” he answered, but she had already knelt in front of him again and began where she’d left off. As she eagerly brought on his release, he could only think of how this didn’t feel wrong like he’d imagined. And how glad he was for that.

Over the next week, they found the perfect balance of seeing to the duties of their home and giving in to their passions. After he’d seen how pleased she was to take him by surprise, he did his best to surprise her with different positions and varying places. His little vixen embraced each one, especially the ones in which she was in control.

He was more than happy to surrender.

He glanced over at the bonny woman sleeping next to him. He couldn’t believe this was his life. He was almost afraid to blink for fear she would be gone if he looked away. The familiar fear gripped him, bringing a cool sweat to his spine. He’d felt this way before, and it had caused him a pain so severe he’d barely survived. If he lost Lindsay…

Nay. He’d protect her. He’d not let her fall to the same fate as Maria. But as he tried to calm his pounding heart, he remembered a threat that remained. Something no amount of protection would be able to save them from. His duty as laird.

What would happen when he told her the truth and they moved to the castle? Would she hate him for forcing her into such a life? One she wasn’t prepared for. When her eyes opened and a smile pulled across her beautiful lips, he made love to her slowly and purposefully, telling her all the things he couldn’t say out loud.

Please forgive me. Please don’t leave me.

When he’d claimed her climax and took his own release, they sprawled lazily across the bed until the dog began whining at the door for her morning meal. Lindsay covered her stomach when it growled as well. “I must feed my women,” he said with a laugh.

They got dressed, and he smiled when she pulled on the blue dress. He found her beautiful in both gowns, but the blue was his favorite. He went for water at the river while she checked the traps.

“I’m going into the village to trade these two rabbits for a bit of ham. Do ye need anything?” she asked.

“Do ye wish for me to go with you?” He didn’t like when she went off alone, especially in the village, where those men from the guard might see her. But he knew he couldn’t smother her, either.

“I’ll be fine. You don’t need to go to the trouble.”

“You are worth a great amount of trouble to me, so make sure ye come back as you are now,” he said, unable to help the way his voice cracked.