Page 117 of Getting Down to Business

Chapter 23

Gray’s feet pulled him quickly toward the exit of the prison. He couldn’t wait to be out of there. He was nearly hyperventilating by the time he got outside. He sucked in the damp air. The puddles in the parking lot rippled slightly as he walked to the rental car. He tilted his head to the last of the rain, letting the drops cleanse him.

The anxiety remained as he drove to the train station. What had he been thinking?

When the guard had called his name, he stood to follow him to the visiting room, but he couldn’t go through with it. It wasn’t fear that kept him from walking up to Donnie and begging him to help Alyssa. It was the knowledge that if Gray had any chance of a future with her, they were going to have to find the path together, and Donnie had no part in that.

Gray might not know how to help her yet, but he’d known the answer wasn’t inside a prison.

Due to an earlier storm, there was a maintenance problem with the track, so the train stopped two stations out of Syracuse for what they said would be a few hours. He might have driven the four hours back in a rental car if he wasn’t already so exhausted. He might have switched to a bus, but he found he wasn’t in a hurry to get back.

He didn’t want to go home until he’d come up with a plan.

From the beginning, they’d agreed to be honest. No bullshit. No games. But he was keeping the truth from her now. He loved her, but he couldn’t tell her. He couldn’t set himself up to be turned down again. And Alyssa wouldn’t just turn him down. She’d be out of his life as quickly as she could pack her things.

As he sat at the bar near the train station, he glanced up to see a dark-haired woman smiling at him. He smiled back. Not in a way that would make him look interested, but unfortunately she interpreted interest anyway.

She came to sit next to him with a smile on her face.

“You look lonely over here all by yourself,” she said.

He was lonely, but nothing this woman had to offer would fix that.

“Can I ask you a question?” Gray said.

“Okay.” The woman looked uncertain, but the smile didn’t leave her face.

“What is worse? Facing the very slim chance you could have your heart broken, or being alone for the rest of your life?”

The woman’s brow creased at the question, but she seemed to be thinking of an answer.

“I’m going to guess you mean someone other than me.”

“Yes.”

“I’d have to say being alone. It sucks. Loneliness makes us do stupid things.” She frowned at the drink in her hands.

“Right. That’s what I was thinking too.”

“Your girl doesn’t agree?”

“My girl doesn’t want to be my girl because she got blindsided by someone else.”

“And you’re so sure you won’t ever mess up and hurt her the same way? Can you guarantee you won’t?” the woman challenged.

“I guess not. I know she’s the only woman I’ve ever wanted like this. No one knows what happens next. Shouldn’t it be about now?”

“We’re both here now.” Was she still trying?

“I’m in love with her. I’m not going to do anything to mess it up.”

“Then maybe she’s missing out.”

The woman moved on and Gray pulled out his phone to call Alyssa. He wasn’t just late any more. He probably wouldn’t be there until after eleven at this rate. He paused. What would he say? That he’d come to Syracuse to visit Donnie of all people? No. She would not appreciate that.

He sent a vague text and ordered another beer, silently hoping the train would never be able to leave.

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