Page 62 of Caroline’s Compass

“No.”

“I should have told you about the letter immediately.”

“Yes.”

“You could make forgiveness less painful.”

“I could. I am choosing not to.”

His mouth moved at one corner. “Fair.”

Caroline looked toward Rebecca and Hall. The oxen plodded steadily up the slope, neither aware that it had delayed twelve wagons and one courtship.

“I wanted you to bring me an answer,” she said. “A complete one. Fort or trail. Work or family. As if you could solve our lives while I measured flour.”

“I would have tried.”

“I know. Wanting the answer immediately is another way of carrying everything alone. I do it to my sisters. I nearly demanded that you do it for me.”

Thomas stepped closer. “What do we do instead?”

“Finish the decision together.”

“Is the courtship still paused?”

Caroline considered him. “Partially.”

“What does a partial courtship permit?”

“Walking.”

“We have been doing that.”

“Then you are succeeding.”

He laughed, and the last of her anger loosened.

After the oxen reached camp, Samuel Turner attempted to thank the recovered animal with half his breakfast biscuit. The ox accepted the biscuit, Samuel's sleeve, and nearly the entire boy. Rebecca extracted him by the back of his trousers.

“He likes me,” Samuel said.

“He likes biscuits,” Rebecca replied.

“I had the biscuit.”

“That made you adjacent to affection.”

Mr. Turner repaired the failed night rope while Caroline reviewed the picket system. Thomas suggested a second line between the teams. Rebecca added a bell to the least reliable ox. Lydia named the animal Liberty because he had escaped once and would undoubtedly discuss it forever.

The bell rang each time Liberty chewed. By supper, the older Mrs. Bell threatened to put cloth around the clapper. Mr. Bell said the ox was performing public service. Mrs. Bell said the public had heard enough.

Caroline assigned rotating stock checks and included herself only once. Rebecca noticed but did not comment. Thomas noticed and smiled. Caroline told him partial courtship did not permit smugness.

“What portion permits admiration?”

“A very small one.”

“I will measure carefully.”