Page 296 of A Vicious Love

“They matter if I know them.”

“They were before the announcement.”

“But I might have been kind to them.” Her voice shook now, even as she tried to control it. “I might have sat across from a woman who knew how you sounded in those rooms while I was trying to get through dinner with you. I might have smiled at someone who had a standard appointment with you while you looked at me as if you couldn’t stand breathing the same air.”

“That didn’t happen.”

Her eyes flashed. “You just said⁠—”

“Listen to me. Before the engagement was announced, yes, there were women. After? No one.”

She stared at me, fighting the truth because the lie had lived longer in her head.

“No one,” I repeated. “Not once. No club arrangements, and secret girlfriend in my bed. The day our engagement became public, that part of my life closed.”

“Because of the contract?”

“Because Crows don’t cheat.” I let my hand stay on her thigh, thumb moving slowly through warm water. “We’re many things. Faithful is one of them. Once a woman is placed under our name, no one else touches what belongs to her. Body, bed, house, private rooms. Closed.”

She looked as if she wanted to believe me and hated how badly she wanted it.

“But you didn’t want me.”

Her breathing had started to sharpen. Tiny, quick pulls of air. She was looking past me now, into some room from years ago, seeing women and old rumors lining up until they became proof.

No.

I caught her face between both hands.

“Look at me, baby.”

Her eyes found mine.

“Stay here.”

“I am.”

“No, you’re halfway in some ballroom where you think I humiliated you in front of women I was fucking. That room is dead. Come back to me.”

Her lips trembled.

“Breathe.”

She tried.

“Again. Slower.”

Her shoulders lowered a fraction.

“Good girl.” I brushed my thumb along her cheekbone.

Her lashes fluttered. “I feel silly.”

“You’re not silly. You’re hurt.”

Her eyes shone harder at that.

I lowered my voice. “No woman has had me since you. No one in those rooms had what you think they had while you were sitting beside me. I should have told you enough that Harlan couldn’t write stories in the gaps. That failure is mine.”