Page 64 of Ashes to Ash’s

Cal

Every time I thought Ash was just obtuse, or twisted, he revealed a little more of his heart, and this time he literally plucked it out and set it on a platter, handing it to me without fear. He knew I could refuse him yet again, but he risked it. He risked it for love, and now that’s what I wanted to do. Every day I wanted to remind him that we belonged together, because we’d survived so much already, and we’d keep surviving.

I didn’t need to press him down any longer, because he was willingly reaching for my cock as I spread my legs wider, and offered it to him. His fingers eagerly wrapped around it, and a shudder ran up my spine at his touch.

I wanted this. I wanted it so much. I wanted everything with him, but that niggly little voice in my head was back.

I’m not enough. He’ll tire of me, because he’ll realise he can do better. He’ll find someone who isn’t so damaged.

“Cal?”

I blinked out of my troubled thoughts, and met his dark eyes.

“Whatever the fuck’s going on in that head, just stop it. Focus on this.” He lowered his head again, and his mouth enveloped the head of my cock, sucking lightly as his tongue teased at the… fuck… that’s how it feels?

“Holy…”

“Nothing holy about this,” he whispered as he released my cock, circling the tip with his tongue, “actually scratch that, this is a fucking moment of reverence. This is my altar to worship at.”

His mouth took me again and I groaned, as both hands landed on the back of his head. Not pushing, not rushing him, just connecting with him, with this act he was gracing me with. I’d heard so much about blessings, but this was being blessed. The things he was doing with his mouth, with his tongue… those were blessings.

His head suddenly dipped down so low I almost lost my grip on his hair, and with a choking sound, he pressed his face against my pelvis. What the fuck!

“Ash! Ash, stop, you’ll choke!” He made another gagging sound, and his throat flexed around my cock, and holy shit, I couldn’t hold back, my pleasure rearing up and filling me, in turn filling him, as my cum flowed into his willing mouth. He pulled back as he swallowed, sucking all the way and sighing happily as he finally released me, his fingers stroking my length as he licked his lips.

“I… I’m sorry… I couldn’t… it felt so…”

Ash pressed his face against my thigh, chuckling softly, even though he still panted breathlessly. It was a ragged but intimate sound. He was undone because of what we’d just indulged in.

“Babe… that was… so… fucking… hot,” he gasped out between breaths, still stroking me lightly with his fingers.

“I… I didn’t really mean to come inside… I couldn’t stop.”

He rolled his head back, those dark eyes fixing on mine, so much pleasure and intensity there in his gaze. He looked perfectly at home at my feet, resting against me as if he’d been the one sated instead of me.

“Cal, don’t ever apologise for enjoying the things I do to you. I wanted exactly what happened. Your cum tastes fucking good.”

The idea of enjoying the taste of cum pretty much sent a ripple of distaste through my brain, making me grimace, but I rested a hand on Ash’s head, stroking his hair and he practically sagged against me. It was as if being petted by me like this fulfilled something for him, but I had no idea what. He was my only real sexual experience, and normally he took the lead. Something about this though… he seemed more at peace than before. Was it because we’d shared our feelings at last, and given in to what we’re feeling?

“Ash?”

“Mmm?” He sounded almost sleepy as he responded, his dark lashes fluttering as his eyes drifted closed.

“Ash, you didn’t get to… uh… get off.”

He chuckled softly, shaking his head.

“Don’t look down, babe, and watch where you walk.”

Oh yuck. He came on the carpet?

“Ash!”

Another chuckle, but he was getting so sluggish and relaxed as he rested against me that my leg was starting to slide outward, and we’d both end up in a pile on a cum-covered carpet if we weren’t careful.

“Get up here,” I murmured, and he groaned.

“Comfy here. Like it here.”