Page 61 of Ashes to Ash’s

“Why the hell does that thought make you horny? You know that’s not right, don’t you?”

Ash turned and pressed me against that railing over the stairs, that just above waist-height railing that we could easily topple over. Was the risk making it sexier? Was I losing my mind like the rest of his family?

His lips touched my cheek again, and then my lips, as he kissed me ferociously, his tongue owning my mouth while I just took it, and allowed it, and welcomed it.

“Everything makes me horny, baby…” he whispered in my ear, as he turned my face to the side, and licked my cheek.

“Creepy.”

“You’re in a room, and I want to fuck you. You’re on this planet, and I want to fuck you. There’s no not being horny while you exist. Don’t you get that? You’re my every breath, my every heartbeat. You’re everything I live for. You’re mine, Cal, but I’m just as much yours. Always.”

I fisted his hair in both hands, and dragged his mouth back to mine, taking control of this next kiss, putting everything into it. My heart, my soul, my every thought and dream. He was the only one I could be myself with. The only one who accepted the parts of me that I’d hidden for too long.

“Need to fuck you, Cal,” Ash breathed against my lips, and I didn’t argue. Wait, that’s not true. I argued about one point, and one point only.

“Not here where we could both fall to our deaths, Ash. That’s not hot.”

“It’s a little hot,” he protested, but I shook my head, sliding a hand down to grab his cock through his trousers, his breath hissing out at my touch.

“Bedroom. Not because I’m being closeted, but because I don’t find the threat of death sexy. Besides, I don’t want Ren walking in on us.”

Ash rolled his eyes, grabbing my hand and towing me along to the bedroom, but a wicked grin appeared just as he turned and led me instead to the family bathroom.

“Ash,” I warned, but he just laughed, locking the door behind us, before he pushed me up against it.

“Let’s get clean together, and then get dirtier,” he whispered, tugging my t-shirt over my head, as I sighed, and reached for his, to do the same.

As soon as we were under the heated spray of the water, Ash was pressing me against the icy cold tiles and kissing me. I’d fought against what I’d wanted for so long, but now it was here, right in front of me. It was love, acceptance, respect, and a healthy dose of obsession, apparently.

I felt him sliding his hand around my ass, and fingers teased at my asshole, and for the first time in my life that wasn’t horrifying. Not because it’d been a horror before with Ash, but because for the first time in my life, I felt no shame at enjoying his touch. I felt no sense of wrongness, no sense that I was betraying my faith, or my species. I’m gay. That’s what’s going on here, and I think I’ve finally accepted it.

Ash’s fingers pressed inside me, and I relished the burn as they spread me, and the bastard wasn’t using anything resembling lube, so it felt like my ass was resisting them.

“Lube,” I gasped out, and Ash laughed, licking my bottom lip as he pulled back.

“We’re in the shower, baby. I don’t have lube in here.” He glanced around, and picked up a bottle of bodywash. “We could try with this?”

“Fuck no. Don’t be ridiculous. No lube, no ass.”

Ash’s free hand wrapped around my cock and he stroked it in one smooth glide, sending a ripple of pleasure up my spine. Fuck me. How could one touch feel so fucking good?

“You can suck me then.”

My eyes, which had apparently closed with the pleasure he caused me, shot open and I stared in shock at his smiling eyes and wide grin. What the hell?

“Come on, baby, don’t you want to taste me again?”

I slapped at his chest and he laughed again.

“Fine. I’ll blow you, and I’ll just suffer. Maybe get myself off. You know it’s called ‘give’ and take, right?”

I reached for him, but he was already dropping to his knees in front of me, and something about him being down there like that was doing something to me. It made me feel powerful, strong. It made me feel like I was the one in charge for once, and it was a surprisingly heady feeling. I slid my fingers into his hair as he grasped my cock in his fist and stroked it, the heated friction sending a chill zinging up my spine.

“Jesus, Ash.”

He grinned up at me, the grin widening as my fingers tightened in his thick hair.

“That’s nothing, babe. Wait until you feel a hot wet mouth around your cock. It’s the best feeling.”