Page 27 of The Quiet Rebuild

Unlike them, it seemed, Lindsey still struggled to admit that, mostly to herself. Maybe she didn’t want the kind of attention that would bring.

“Hey, Lindsey,” Winona said, her voice bright. “Have you ever been to Los Angeles?”

“I have. But only briefly,” Lindsey said. “It was for a scuba conference about a thousand years ago.”

Winona gave Taylor a big-eyed look, urging her to ask Lindsey what Taylor had already asked Winona. Taylor set her fork down, her heart pounding. She wasn’t sure what had gotten into her when she’d asked Winona to join her in LA. She didn’t want to put that on anyone.

“What’s up?” Lindsey asked, none the wiser.

Winona nodded, her eyes urgent. They seemed to say, Come on, Taylor. Don’t go alone.

Finally, Taylor groaned. “The thing is, I’m terrified to go to the city on my own.”

Lindsey’s lips parted with surprise. “Do you want company?”

“She does.” Winona nodded. “And who wouldn’t?”

“You don’t have to do it,” Taylor assured her. “Honestly, I’m a grown woman. I can go to my mother’s funeral on my own. I’m embarrassed even to mention it.”

But it looked as though Lindsey had already begun to weigh it up in her mind. “It would certainly make Gwen and Candice happy, knowing you weren’t out there on your own.”

“I’m always out there on my own,” Taylor reminded her, and herself. “It’s not a big deal.”

“You’re leaving tomorrow?” Lindsey asked.

“The plane leaves at one,” Taylor said.

“Let me know when you plan to leave here,” Lindsey said.

Taylor’s thoughts began to race. “I don’t know. I mean, it might be boring for you. My silly, lonely Californian life…”

“I don’t want to force myself,” Lindsey said, drawing back, her cheeks growing slack.

Taylor pulled her tongue over her teeth. She thought, Would it really be so bad to have someone around? Someone to laugh with? Someone who didn’t know anyone in her life? Someone for whom this was all foreign, at a distance?

“I’ll go home,” Lindsey said then, a smile fluttering at the edge of her lips. “I have to pack.”

Taylor let her shoulders drop forward. “If that’s really what you want.”

“It is.” Her meal only half finished, Lindsey sprang up and left, eager to prepare for the day ahead. Taylor rolled her eyes into the back of her head and asked aloud, “What am I doing?”

“You’re asking for help,” Winona said gently. “It’s the best thing you can do in this situation.”

“But there’s so much Lindsey doesn’t understand about my family, about my past, about any of it,” Taylor protested, lowering her voice.

“You can always change your mind,” Winona said. “But I don’t want you to go to the city by yourself. I don’t want you to face this alone. The point of the Harbor House, as I understand it so far, is that we don’t have to be alone in our pain any longer. We can move forward. We can face ourselves.”

“Oh, Winona,” Taylor said, teasing her. “Why do you always have to be right?”

13

As soon as Lindsey got home, she called Candice and told her the news. “I’m going to LA.”

Candice’s voice shook. “You’re kidding.”

“I’m not. Taylor wants someone to be there during the mess of it all, and it’s going to be me. I don’t have anything else going on here, anyway.”

But at that moment, another call came in. It was from Jake, the bird-watcher. A shiver went down her spine. “Can I call you back?” she asked her sister. “I’m getting another call.”