Page 140 of Scarred Crown

“Should it be easy?” Brice’s words are floating around my head, but I can’t figure out whether these differences Julia and I are having should sink us. I don’t want them to, but that’s my heart talking.

“I would never call my parents’ marriage easy, but I know they’d both say it was worth it. What do you think your parents would say?”

Truthfully, I have no idea. They’ve always made it a point not to get into big fights around us, but I’ve realized from the silences at various dinners that they do happen. Maybe seeing their arguments explode and resolve would have helped me now.

“There’s no divorce for royals,” I say. “This is our chance to be sure we want to be married right now.”

Julia sucks in a shaky breath. “You’re not sure about us?” Her voice breaks at the end, and a sheen of tears glosses over her eyes.

I stare at her for a beat and try to be completely honest with myself. The tequila I just drank makes my tongue looser than normal. “That’s not what I said, and it’s not what I meant either. I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone. But a grenade went off in my lap the other day. My father is sick. He’s dying.” My voice catches on that reality. “My country is holding a referendum on a topic I feel very strongly about. My wife—sorry, I mean, you—kept a lot from me.”

It breaks my fucking heart to see her so sad. The last thing I want to do is hurt her, but I don’t know how to put all these intense negative emotions aside either. Not yet. Maybe Brice was right about at least one thing.

“I need a bit of time to sort through my feelings. We toppled headlong into this, didn’t we?

“We did,” she agrees. “But it doesn’t mean we were wrong.” There’s a hint of pleading in her voice.

“Just give me a little bit of time and then we’ll talk it through, I promise.” I drag her into my arms and kiss her forehead.

“I’m not giving up on us.” She wraps her arms around me and breathes me in.

We stay like that, relaxed and holding each other while my eyelids grow heavy.

When I wake up, she’s gone, and the hollowness in my chest is back.

Julia

I’ve spent the last two days in Posey’s guestroom reading through the four-hundred-page document that makes up coronation protocol and avoiding the outside world. My highlighter is beside me, and I’m making notes on my laptop of all the things that are legally binding for the coronation as well as things that are no longer viable because of changes in technology, tradition, or the materials no longer exist.

Someone needs to condense and update this protocol for modern times. Perhaps I’ll suggest it to whoever takes over as Alex’s secretary once the coronation is over.

On top of my own personal drama, news of the king’s illness broke late last night, and I’m sure the palace is in a frenzy. Who leaked it? Could have been Alex, could have been Nick… could have been any of the people who overheard one of us talking about it the last few days.

I should get dressed and head over to the palace to help manage the fallout, but I can’t bring myself to leave my bed.

Posey knocks on the doorframe to my room. “I’m leaving for work. Remember we’re ordering sushi tonight. Tomorrow, Brent arrives.” She eyes my mountain of blankets. “Are you going to get dressed today?”

“Not sure why I would,” I mutter while I make another note on my laptop. Listening to Brent and Posey make up for their long distance over the next few days is not my idea of a good time. Maybe I’ll need noise-canceling headphones.

“If you don’t get dressed today, I’m calling Mom.”

I laugh, but it doesn’t hold any humor. “Mom is too busy to come to your rescue. You’re stuck with me squatting in your spare room, dirty and miserable.”

“Fine. I’ll call Nick.”

That gets my attention. I glare at her and try my best to shoot fire out of my eyes. “You wouldn’t dare.” Since I haven’t gotten out of bed for two days, I have safely avoided any run-ins with him. Last time I saw him, he was sleeping peacefully on an uncomfortable couch in Brice’s suite.

“If I called and told him you needed him, he’d come.”

“I’m not playing dirty. He said he needed space, and I’m giving him space.” Staying away has sent me into a spiral, and I can’t deny that. Part of me wants to storm the estate and tell Nick he’s ridiculous, and part of me is terrified that pushing too hard again will send him further away.

“Don’t worry, I’ll play dirty for you.” Posey winks and juts out a hip. She turns in the doorway and sails down the hall. “If you’re not out of bed when I get back, game on!”

I growl and sink lower into the plush bedding. She won’t do it.

Picking up my highlighter again, I turn the page in the manual and check the newest batch of things the incoming king must possess. My hand stalls on line ten, and my blood runs cold.

Prior to the coronation, the heir apparent must be wed.