Page 46 of Unmasked

A child… of my own.

Mine.

But where the new love healed things inside of me, the familiar fears I knew so well arose. Terrors, even, at the thought that something could happen to Penelope or our new child. To believe in dreams without the nightmares was delusional. I couldn’t afford to do that. Instead, I jumped from elation to possessiveness to euphoria to… distress.

The anxiety within me grew.

I leaned forward, pressing my lips softly to her stomach. Penelope stirred, and her fingers pushed through my hair. I turned, kissing against her palm. Her eyes were closed, and she looked so peaceful. So perfect in my bed. Her coloring was back, and she’d been feeling better.

But for how long?

And now I was going to let her go to Scotland… away from Lord Oxley… away from The Order… away from me?

She’d have Able and Mark.

They weren’t enough. Not even The Order was enough against the guards of England.

What if I couldn’t get her back? What if something happened and⁠—

My stare went back to her stomach. Penelope turned to face me, and I wrapped my hand around her hip and waist, kissing the one thing that symbolized…. hope. Love—my love for her.

I closed my lids, burying my face against her. I prayed. Bargained. Promised things I might not be able to keep. Desperation had me easing from the bed. As I stared down at her sleeping frame, sickness swarmed. She’d leave for Scotland soon. Less than twenty-four hours, and I wasn’t sure I could let her.

I couldn’t.

I couldn’t.

Every time I tried to force myself to accept her truth, my mind refused.

Putting on the black suit, I didn’t even bother to put on a tie. My shirt was half undone. I went into the bathroom, stopping to look at the tests. I’d brought the first back to our room and even made her take another. Both positive. Both… promising me a dream I wasn’t sure I deserved. I picked up the tests on the counter, putting them in my pocket with my phone and keys. I headed out, covering Penelope up. When I walked towards the door, I couldn’t help but look back.

Every part of me refused to let her go.

Opening the door, I shut it softly, turning to face the four guards.

“No one goes in this room. You know the drill. If she leaves, you call me immediately and escort her wherever she’s going.”

“Yes, Unavowed.”

I took out my phone, calling The Reeve. His voice was slightly scratchy, and I knew I’d awoken him. It was after five in the morning, and I couldn’t sleep.

“Meeting. Now. Wake The Magister and The Judic.”

I hung up, heading to the Great Hall. I got coffee. I was so deep inside the worry, I was lost inside my head. I didn’t even hear The Reeve approach.

“Sire?”

He waved at the slave, but she was already scattering to grab a coffee to bring to him.

“I’m ready. I was just thinking.”

“Are you okay? Is your Intended?”

“I don’t know.”

His brow creased, and he slowly nodded. He took the coffee, following me to the hall that took us to the Gathering Room. The Magister was just sitting down, and the Judic was taking their place. The Reeve walked around, joining them while I stayed on the opposing side. And maybe that’s how I felt. Them against me. Them… not helping… me. I understood their roles, but what good were they? I knew the answer to that, but through the anxiety, I couldn’t find it.

I placed down my coffee on the table. Then, my phone. I took in the way their attention was on me, but I could not see the faces of the men who held my fate—my child’s fate in their hands.