Page 96 of Uncrowned

“You’re probably starving. Let’s talk about it over dinner.”

“I’d like that.”

I followed Marian out, leaving the apartment and getting on the elevator. Instead of going down, we headed up higher into the building. I wasn’t sure what to expect, but what we walked into wasn’t it. It wasn’t a restaurant, but more, a large room with a handful of tables. Candles and flowered centerpieces covered them, but I barely noticed as I headed forward to the floor-length windows. We were so high, and the sun was setting in the distance. It was beautiful. Somewhere out there Vaughn was waiting, maybe even looking for me.

“This is spectacular.”

Marian took her place at the table, letting me have my space as she ordered a drink. I gave mine, losing myself in the bright colors casted over the buildings and traffic in the distance.

“It’s one of my favorite views.”

“I can see why. It’s truly breathtaking.”

I headed to the table. I looked for a menu but there wasn’t any. Marian seemed to notice, throwing me a smile.

“They’ll make anything you want.”

“Anything?”

She laughed. “I haven’t found anything they can’t make. Trust me, I’ve tested them. Michelle’s a great cook.”

“Oh. Maybe something small. I’m not too hungry.”

“I’m getting mac and cheese. Michelle makes the best. You can always try that.”

“Mac and cheese? For dinner?”

Marian’s confusion only lasted a moment before she laughed. “Sometimes, you just need comfort food. If it’s not mac and cheese, for me, it’s mashed potatoes and gravy. And yes, as a meal. You should see how fast I can wipe out a bowl. That’s the beauty of being an adult and alone. There’s no one telling you what to do anymore.”

“As a meal,” I repeated. “Okay. I’ll have some mac and cheese, too.”

“Excellent.”

Marian smiled and waved towards a waiter in the distance. As she talked with them, I got lost in my thoughts—my schemes.

Orders…

How could I get a message to Vaughn? How could I bypass Marian and the SLB without getting caught? What would I even say—You pissed me off, so I ran away. Sorry, I won’t break my vows to you or your guards. See you in the future—take care—I’m on a mission? That wouldn’t work.

A groan almost left me, but Marian’s stare snapped me back to reality.

“I’m sorry? Did you say something?”

A soft smile appeared.

“Nothing important. I’m glad you came up here with me.”

“Me too.” I took a drink of my water, frowning. “I’m sorry. I’m a little all over the place in my head. I must be horrible company.”

“You’re fine, really. Penny, I just want you to know I’m here for you. No matter what. I haven’t faced what you have, but I do have experience with bad people. Just take your time healing. There’s no rush. I know you asked to work to stay busy, and I get it, but you are free to leave the office at any point if things become too much for you. You are not obligated to keep a job. Truthfully, I don’t even know how you’re doing it. You’re so much stronger than you know.”

Tears blinded me, but I kept them in.

“I’ve always wanted to have a job. My parents wouldn’t let me work or intern anywhere. My degree path wasn’t even my choice; it was my father’s. Art History, hence, my reading selection.” I rolled my eyes. “It was fitting for a titled wife. I didn’t even get to finish before I ruined that.” Seconds passed, and I gasped, covering my mouth. “That must have sounded so horrible. They’re dead and I’m… complaining. That’s so ungrateful of me.”

“Don’t cry.” Marian’s hand came out to try to comfort me. “It’s okay to be upset about that. You wanted other things. It’s completely understandable.”

I wiped the tear that escaped. “Is it? I have so much guilt. I can’t even think straight. Everything feels wrong.”