Page 81 of Aurelia

“You mean you fell in love with him?”

Nora smiled sadly. “No, I’m afraid there has only ever been one man for me, Aurelia, and that was my husband.” She sighed. “I only pretended to love Roland.”

“When did you tell him the truth?” Aurelia’s eyes bulged. “He does know, doesn’t he?”

Nora laughed, but there was no amusement in it. “Yes, he knows. I did not tell him until we had been together ten months. Even then, my motives for telling the truth were less than pure. You see, I was pregnant. When Roland found out, he insisted that we marry. I was terrified the earl would throw me out of the cottage and stop the money.” She inhaled deeply and then exhaled slowly. “The earl was furious about the child but even angrier that Roland wanted to marry me. He ordered me to tell Roland that I had been paid to pretend that I loved him. I was to confess the truth: that I felt nothing for him at all. And so I did exactly that.”

Aurelia could only stare, horrified.

“Roland’s reaction stunned both me and the earl. He was upset at the lies, but he said we must marry for the sake of our child. Even though I had lied to him, he claimed that he still loved me.” She shook her head.

“You don’t think he did?”

“How could he even know what love was? He was six-and-ten and I was his first lover,” Nora said, as if that explained everything. “His father forbade Roland from seeing me—certainly there was no question of marriage—but, for the first time in his life, his mild-mannered son stood up to the earl. They fought and it was dreadful. Roland came to me and was furious at his father. He said he would disobey his father and we would have to leave the island. I was terrified! I knew how hard life could be. But Roland, for all that he was so smart, was only sixteen and naïve about the ways of the world.

“And so, when the earl approached me, I was willing to agree to whatever he proposed. I left the island in the middle of the night and was taken to a place where I could have my child. He would pay an allowance only so long as I never contacted Roland.” A tear slid down her cheek. “By accepting his bargain, I ended any chance of love between father and son. Years later, after Roland found me and brought me back to Crewe, I saw firsthand the rift I’d created between them.”

“It was hardly your fault. If anyone was to blame it would be the late earl,” Aurelia said, irrationally irked at a dead man. “How like a man to believe his son isn’t masculine enough unless he has engaged in the requisite amount of coitus. And once his son did behave like a man—a gentleman—and accepted responsibility for his actions then the old earl was disgusted.”

“I could not have said it better myself, Aurelia.” Nora gave a watery chuckle and dabbed at her eyes with a lace-edged handkerchief. “Roland began searching for me almost from the day I left, using his allowance to pay for an inquiry agent. When he turned one-and-twenty and came into his inheritance, then he had more money to spend on the search and he quickly found me. By that point, the old earl did not care that Roland brought Guustin and me back to the island. All he had ever wanted to do was to break the hold I’d had over his son. With that shattered, I was no longer a threat and the earl just ignored my existence.”

Nora snorted. “The old rake got far more than he bargained for when he brought me into Roland’s life. Before I came along, he had a reserved but obedient and malleable son. Afterward… well, Roland was his own man in every way. He still pursued his naturalist studies, but he was no longer innocent and shy. He was like a different man.” She shook herself and tucked away her handkerchief. “So, there is my sad story—but with a happy ending because I have a fine son.”

Aurelia suddenly recalled what Celsa had shouted at her the day she’d met Nora for the first time.

Nora cocked her head. “What is it? You look as if you want to ask me something.”

“It is about something Celsa said.”

“She told you that Roland is not her father, didn’t she?’

“Yes,” Aurelia said, startled that the woman had guessed so quickly.

“I would like to strangle whoever it was who told Celsa that.”

“So, it is—”

“It is true,” Nora said grimly.

Aurelia was about to ask Nora how she knew that when the door to the sitting room opened and Guustin entered, his eyes moving from his mother to Aurelia, confusion clear in his gaze.

“Aurelia. What a surprise.”

“Guustin!” Nora held out her hands. “You are back early.”

“We finished up sooner than expected.” Guustin kissed his mother’s cheek. “You are flushed. Have you been overexerting yourself, Mama?”

“No, no, not at all.”

Aurelia glanced at the watch pinned to her habit. “I did not realize I’d been here so long,” she said, getting to her feet.

“It has been such a delightful afternoon,” Nora said, and then looked at her son. “The sky looks to be darkening. You should escort Aurelia back to the castle, Guustin.”

Aurelia shook her head. “Oh, that’s not nec—”

“It will be my pleasure,” Guustin said.

The sky had indeed turned menacing as Aurelia and Guustin mounted and began the ride back to the castle.