Page 33 of Deadly Lust

I dug in the back of a drawer and found a picture of Mia and me kissing at BUD/S graduation with Joaquín in the background. I remembered that day so clearly. Mia was wearing her sundress and beaming with pride. My chest was bloody from when my commanding officer pounded my trident into my flesh, a scar I wore proudly. Best day of my life. I’d achieved my goal, was about to embark on my dream career, and had the love of my life by my side.

But after studying the picture, a wave of nausea hit me. Something set me off. The way Joaquín was looking at Mia. His lips were pressed flat and his face wore a pinched expression. He looked angry on what should’ve been the happiest day of his life.

I couldn’t be certain, and I was probably reading something into it, but it almost looked as if he was jealous of us. Maybe he had just been jealous that he didn’t have a steady girlfriend who loved him the way Mia loved me.

He and Mia had always been strangely close, but I figured it wasn’t my place to judge. I didn’t have a sister. But Joaquín and Mia’s relationship had always seemed unnatural, like that stupid Friends episode, where that guy Rachel was dating was bathing with his sister. A few times, I’d caught Joaquín watching Mia too long—too intently.

Fuck, I didn’t even know what I was thinking. I was probably a sick fuck for even thinking something was off. Either way, had he been any other man, I would’ve punched him for looking at Mia like that.

We were going to go see him tomorrow, and I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to speak clearly. But the facts were clear in my brain.

Joaquín and Mia were not biologically related. Did that matter? Did he know? And if so, when did he find out?

Joaquín knew she had been raped yet never told me or comforted her. Why? He and I could’ve banded together to try to figure out who had done it. Gone to where the party was held, interviewed people, gone to the police. And even if we hadn’t been able to find out anything, we could’ve been there for Mia. I was certain that if I’d been told about what happened, I would have convinced Mia it wasn’t her fault and she would’ve come back to me. I would’ve taken care of her and married her and raised her son no matter if I was the father or not.

Also, Joaquín was accused of killing Tiffany, the woman who gave my son to her mom to raise. That could not be a coincidence. He’d either known all along that she had our son and killed her to ensure her silence. That possibility was so horrifying that I didn’t even want to think about it. Or he’d found out she was involved in kidnapping our son and killed her in a rage, which would make him a good guy—a hero who killed to protect our child.

That still didn’t explain why he never told me or Mia about the child, so I had my doubts.

I rummaged through my desk to find the number of my vet. I needed to get Curry her shots and get her spayed. But my hand landed on something else.

A box containing the engagement ring I had bought for Mia.

I’d chucked that stupid ring across my hospital room the day she’d left me. I’d considered pawning it, swallowing it with some tequila, or even incinerating it. But something made me hold on to the ring, maybe a small hope that, one day, Mia and I would get back together again.

I opened the box and stared at the small oval diamond ring. It had a thin rose-gold band, which I had thought would look perfect on Mia’s finger.

I snapped the box shut and shoved it to the bottom of my seabag. Too many what-ifs and unknowns. I felt like I was living in my own choose-your-own-adventure book.

Somehow, I doubted that I could change this saga into a happy ending.