Page 35 of Homecoming

I didn’t like the way he got his seat, having a rich daddy buy it for him.

There were hundreds of other, better drivers out there, fighting for the chance. Drivers that respected the sport and the danger it brought to the table.

I also couldn’t stomach the sight of him, strutting through as if he hadn’t had a care in the world, letting everyone do his job for him. If you drove the car, you better fucking pitch in. But not Max. He was in his own world where nothing mattered but him.

I had no say in the matter.

“Okay, let’s win this.” Roman clapped and the huddle disbursed.

I went to my car, got in, and lifted my helmet. Before lowering it, I glanced over to the monitors, where I knew Lola would be, and winked at her.

She waved and blew me a kiss.

Seeing her that carefree gave me a burst of confidence.

I did that.

I made her feel like that.

There was no better feeling in the world.

We lined up at the start, and Kevin’s voice came in, “Check, Check.”

“Yep,” I confirmed I could hear him loud and clear.

“Okay, one lap and then a minute of waiting before the start,” he rattled off in a flat tone like always. “Prediction of a rain. It’s expected to come in an hour.”

“Got it,” I said.

The lights turned off, and off we went into the pre-lap.

As it usually did, since we started, my mind turned to Lola.

I like thinking about her while I drove a slow lap before the start.

It was relaxing and helped me focus.

That time it was no different, but remembering her words gave me an added push.

“It’s a long season. You know where you’re starting but have no idea where you will finish. Everything changes constantly. You’re on your toes every second of the day. It’s the way it is. There are twenty seats and a thousand guys fighting to sit in one. And every race can be your last.” We were whispering in the dark as it became our custom. Something about it was freeing. Still, not freeing enough for me to come clean.

“I don’t know if that’s exciting or just sad.”

“Why sad?”

“Because you don’t see it.”

“Don’t see what?”

“That you have it, you have what you wanted.”

“ I never had stability in my life. No matter how hard I tried to flip things,” I tried to sound like I didn’t care. “Besides, no one knows what the future will bring, so this isn’t any different.”

“I just wish—”

“You wish what?”

“That you’d get it. That you would open your eyes and see you finally have it.”