Page 76 of Lift Me Up

“Sienna,” The tone of my voice is a mix of admonishment and also one of curiosity.

“Come on! I am bored and unbearably pregnant and I need new entertainment. You’re telling me you don’t want to know what comes next?”

I hate that she’s right. I can’t help it, once I’ve started I can’t stop reading, it’s a glimpse into Georgie’s mind I never would have known about and it makes so much sense, I have to know.

I read the last page.

“Holy. Shit.”

“What? What is it?” Sienna’s camera shakes in excitement. She’s holding on to my every word. “Tell me!”

“It’s the answer I’ve been looking for.” I admit, hands shaking and heart pounding and mind endlessly spiralling.

“And?”

Mind made up, I throw myself out of the bed and quickly pull on my shoes, “I need to go.”

“Go? Where?”

“I am going to get my girl,” I say with a smile.

“Hell yeah! Grand gesture the shit out of her. Oh, I am so proud! I could-”

“Sienna,” I warn.

“Right! You gotta go. I’ll see myself out, call me as soon as you’re done proclaiming your love for her⁠—”

I hang up the phone and grab my keys. With one last glance at the pages in my hands, her written words repeat in my mind like a song that won’t leave. I shove the pages into my sweater pocket, man on a mission to tell her exactly how I feel.

There’s no going back. I am in love with her, full stop. And I think… no, I know she loves me back. I can only hope I am not too late.

August 4, 2024

Falling in love is like falling asleep with a book on your chest. One minute you’re lost in the pages, lost in the meaning of a line, lost in the world you’ve hidden away in. Your eyes blink blearily, your heart slows to a steady thrum, and your breathing evens out. Limbs grow heavy. The book slides from your grasp, laying there on your chest wide open and waiting for you to return to the world that you left without even trying.

The thing is, you don’t even realize it’s happening until it’s already happened, until the next time you open your eyes. Everything around you comes into view, and yet you feel like you’re seeing it all through brand new eyes for the first time. Everything is clearer, sharper, and more in focus. The little things you never noticed become the most obvious things.

The little freckle below his bottom lip that you kiss just because you can. The way his brow furrows slightly and his eyes get that focused gaze when he’s concentrating. The dip at the small of his back that is so soft and warm in the glow of the morning sun coming through the window. The way his pants hang off his hips just right. His hair splayed on the pillow in soft tufts. The way his hands feel like sunlight on your skin. The way he takes you into his arms and doesn’t let go.

It’s effortless and terrifying at the same time. You can’t remember how you got to this moment, but you couldn’t be happier to wake up because you know he’s there. Falling in love is just like that.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

GEORGIE

Noah doesn't understand why I don't answer his calls. He said as much on my voicemail for the fifth time in ten minutes. But I can't bear to talk to him, to see his stupid cute face, not right now. I know I haven't given him a chance to explain himself, and I want to give that to him. But I need time. To process how I feel, all the things I want to say that I haven't said, all the things we should have talked about well before this. Now with the added emotions of losing Birdie.

I need to be alone. I take the key out of the plant in the hallway, knowing that if he gets let into the building that he will use it to come inside before I am ready to face him. I turn off my shattered but somehow still working phone, and I sit on the couch cocooned in a blanket that we used for cuddles so many nights in a row. The longer I sit and stew, the more I miss her. The more I miss her, the harder it is to feel anything but anger and grief.

I think I am going to get the call to come get Birdie, but I never do. I want that call to come in more than I want air to breathe or water to drink. Two days pass by, and then a third, but the only calls I get are from Noah, which I ignore. On the fourth day, the rain outside my window lights up the evening sky with soft hues of grey. Lightning makes the world seem like it's on fire, which feels fitting. I think Noah's finally given up on me, for countless reasons I wouldn't blame him for. Maybe letting things fall where they may would hurt less. I take a shower to warm myself up, put on my comfiest pajamas, braid my hair off my face and contemplate eating for the first time today.

Mid-food decision, there's a loud banging on my balcony door, startling me out of my little sad bubble. I slither my way through the house to see who the fuck would make it this far up the balconies this late into the evening and in the nasty rainstorm to boot. When I pull back the curtains slowly, I gasp to see Noah standing outside on my balcony, shoulders rising and falling in heaves, drenched in the rain and holding a bouquet of beautiful, albeit very waterlogged, roses.

"What are you doing out there!?" I shout as I open the balcony door, pulling him inside before he gets even more soaked. He lets out a soft pant, and when he turns, there's water dripping down his nose.

He smiles as he takes in my very not hot pajamas and I instantly move to hide.

"Hello?" I snap in his face, refocusing his attention. "How did you get up here?"