Page 16 of More than Words Can Say

He might need to have a few private conversations with Reuben about the best way to seduce one’s wife. The man had six kids. He had to know a trick or two. But Zach would work out those details later. Right now he just had to convince this sweet innocent that if he met her at the altar, he wouldn’t pounce on her the moment they swapped I do’s.

Her chin went all pointy again as she set her jaw. “And what if I don’t want children—at least not right away? If I want to focus on the bakery?”

He wasn’t exactly sure what he could do about that, but he supposed he could research the matter. “I think that’ll be up to God more than us,” he said, “but I swear I won’t make demands of you that you’re not willing to fulfill.” He let out a sigh and shrugged. “In truth, I never expected to have kids. I planned to live life on my own. I’ve already done the parenting thing with my siblings, and I wouldn’t mind too much not repeating the experience.” Although he found the thought of Abigail swollen with his child more compelling than he would have anticipated. “But if we did end up with a young’un or two, I’d pull my weight and not leave you to carry that load by yourself.”

She eyed him skeptically. “You wouldn’t expect me to give up the running of the bakery to stay home with our children?”

Hadn’t he just said they’d be equal partners? Zach fought off a rising tide of disgruntlement, reminding himself that the main example of husbandly devotion she had to compare him to was a father who’d apparently treated his wife like a broodmare with no consideration for her own goals and dreams or even her physical health.

“Look. Raising kids is time-consuming and hard work. I know. I’ve been there. I imagine it’s even harder with infants. Whether you had a bakery to run or not, I wouldn’t abandon you to shoulder that load alone. When I say we’d be partners, that’s what I mean. We’d share the family responsibilities. It’s obvious that the bakery is important to you. I wouldn’t expect you to give that up just because some little ankle biters showed up on the scene. What I would do is look for ways to help you. Reuben takes his kids to work one morning a week. We could work out something similar. Maybe rig up some sort of fenced play area in the kitchen for the youngsters when they’re with you. I could even hire you some help if need be. You know, with all that extra money I’ll be saving by living with you.”

That earned him another shy smile, and Zach breathed a shade easier. Then a tiny frown wrinkled her brow. “You raised your siblings?”

“Adoptive siblings, but yeah.” Honesty prodded him to paint a more accurate picture. “Well, Seth did most of the raising where little Evie was concerned. I just kept their bellies full and a roof over their heads.”

“Where are they now?” She looked concerned. Probably wondering if he’d dropped them off a cliff somewhere.

“Pecan Gap. Evie married last year. Seth too. They have neighboring farms.”

Those lines in her forehead deepened. “But how could they be adults? You’re not old enough . . .”

He ran a hand over his face. “I got an early start. But that’s a tale for another time.”

Hopefully a much later time. Never, would be his preference. Talking about his stint as a stand-in parent would inevitably lead to talking about how he’d managed to provide for said roofs and full bellies, and he’d rather Abigail not glimpse the darkness of his past. Better to focus on the here and now.

“If it’s all the same to you,” he said, “I’d like to take this here contract home and ponder it awhile.” Maybe even seek the Lord’s guidance, though he and the Big Man were still on rather shaky footing. “Seems like you might want some ponderin’ time too, since I just sprang the whole relations thing on ya. I’ll come by the bakery in the morning before you open, and if we’re both agreed, we can sign it.”

She blinked—twice. “Am I to understand that you’re truly considering my proposal?”

What had the last twenty minutes been, if not consideration? He raised a brow at her. “You trying to talk me out of it?”

“No!” She wagged her head with a vigor that soothed his pride.

It was rather nice being a female’s first choice, even if he’d originally planned to avoid the parson’s mousetrap. Of course, if her second and third choice were Beekman and Ormandy, he couldn’t exactly brag about being top of the list. The rungs on that ladder were pretty low.

“All right, then.” He folded the papers in half and tucked them into the waistband of his trousers. Then he stood and held out a hand to help her rise. It seemed like something a gentleman would do. Not that he was much of a gentleman, but if she was gonna be his wife, he figured he should extend the courtesy.

Besides, at least four pairs of eyes were staring at them from the boardinghouse kitchen window, and he wouldn’t give any of those busybodies reason to wag their tongues about anything improper.

Abigail’s hand slid into his palm, and his fingers closed around hers. She had a strong grip, yet her touch felt nothing like an ordinary handshake. His skin warmed where it touched hers, and little pinpricks paraded up his arm. Not a sensation he was used to, but not one he disliked, exactly, either. He guessed he’d get used to it.

He steered her in such a way that kept her back to the boardinghouse, hoping she’d fail to notice their audience.

“I guess I’ll see you in the morning, then?” she said as she retrieved her hand from his and used it to smooth out her skirt.

“Yes, ma’am.” Zach nodded, trying to convince himself that the thought of sacrificing his freedom didn’t leave him a tad bilious. “Bright and early.”

Her lips curved in a tiny smile, and then she nodded and left him in the boardinghouse yard, watching her hips sway side to side as she made her way down the street.

Maybe he should have signed the papers without giving himself time to think about the consequences. But no. If he was going to tie himself to a woman for life, he needed to make sure he wouldn’t balk at the yoke.

He still had his freedom. He could choose the path his future took. If he chose Abigail, there’d be no going back. No bellyaching about being tied down. No whining with the fellas at the saloon about clipped wings. It would be his choice, and he’d make the best of it, just as he’d been making the best of whatever life threw at him since he was a kid.

Zach tossed a quick glance at the sky before starting the trudge home. You just can’t leave me alone, can you? You keep throwing family at me, even when you know my track record for messing it up. I thought you were smarter than that.

Apparently not.

Zach sighed, his gaze turning south. Was it too late to catch that boat to go visit the queen?