Page 109 of Not Mine to Rescue

I stopped dead. I fought the instinct to cover my stomach, but the instinct won. Maybe I wanted it so badly I couldn’t help myself. “Why do you say that? You’re great with animals.”

He paused the petting he’d initiated. “Animals. I lost one. Almost lost this one. What if I— or something I do puts it in danger and⁠—”

Oh god. A whole fresh fear rose in my heart. I knew how that sentence ended. I’d even uttered it myself at least once. What if I got all the way through this pregnancy and did something stupid or trusted the wrong person with my child and…

“We don’t know the future, do we?” My therapist told me that once.

He looked up. “I’m sorry for bringing it up again.”

“Don’t be. That’s one of things we really need to go through… I suppose.”

“Listen, I don’t want to put you through that.”

“Through what? Loss? Do you think I want to put you through that? But we are doing this, right?” Please tell me I wasn’t going to face this alone.

“I don’t think I can handle anymore. Not right now. I’m not that strong.”

“I’m not either.” Especially if he was going to abandon me. That would hurt too much. My hand turned into a fist.

That earned a much longer stare. He noted the hand clenched against my stomach. “And yet, that isn’t stopping you from trying. Is it? It isn’t stopping your heart from trying.”

Despite the fear making my knees weak, I pulled my hand away and forced it to relax. “You’re tired.” And because of that, I should forgive him for being an asshole. Right?

“Damn straight I tired. I’m tired of pretending I got my act together. I don’t. I’m tired of friends giving me crap about what I like. I’m tired…” He looked away. “Shit. Doesn’t matter. We know who snuck in and lit the barn on fire. I sent the camera footage to the cops.”

It wasn’t my place to ask, was it? “Who?”

He cleared his throat. “Rip the Band-Aid off idiot. A girl. She, uh…”

When a witness stumbled like that, we’re taught to dig deeper because they are hiding the truth. “One of your women?”

This time there was a frown on his face and his eyes were sharp. “Yeah. One of my women. I fucked her in December. She got clingy, and I scraped her off. She didn’t take that well.”

It sucked having a good memory. “You were flirting with me in December.”

“And you turned me down. What was I supposed to do? Wait? I knew you were out of my league.”

A whisper of doubt bit my thoughts. “Do you still think I’m out of your league?”

“All the damn time. I mean, look.” He gestured at his clothes. “I’ve got to sit on the dog couch because I’m a fucking mess.”

“Stand up.”

“No.”

“Wombat, stand up, walk your ass upstairs and sit on⁠—”

“I’m not doing it. You’re going to have to prove your point another way, lady.”

He was infuriating. “Lady?”

He grinned. “Sweet Tits?”

“Goddamn bikers.”

That made him stand up. He crowded my space. “That’s right. I’m a goddamn biker. I’m going to be a Destroyer for as long as I live. Face that. I’m going to be crude. I’m going to party my ass off, get drunk, pass out, and not come home. And you need to hear this because I don’t fit in your world, and as much as I wish you could fit in mine, I don’t want that for you. I don’t want you wasting⁠—”

“Don’t tell me what I want.”