Page 27 of It Was Always You

Pulling away from him, she peered into his bright green eyes, which were now filled with emotions that she didn’t want to acknowledge. ‘Scared? Why?’

He tucked her hair behind her ear. ‘You stayed away so long I thought you weren’t going to come back to me.’ His jaw clenched. ‘But I would have had to come and find you, Lily. I… I⁠—’

Dreading the next words to fall from his mouth, Lily interrupted, ‘Well, I’m here now,’ she trilled, ‘and I’m shattered. Can we go home so I can sleep?’

He pouted. ‘Sleep? I haven’t seen you or held you in over a month and you want to sleep?’

She bit her lip. ‘Well, sleep first and then…’ She kissed him deeply, igniting a passion in him that she knew she would definitely benefit from later. He groaned into her mouth as he held his hand knotted in her tangled curls.

They arrived back at his rented apartment, and she dumped her bag in the bedroom. He followed her in and slipped his arms around her waist again, nuzzling her neck. ‘I’m going to cook you something incredible while you get some rest,’ he told her before placing a kiss just below her ear.

Turning in his arms, Lily looked up at him. ‘What do you see in me, Bodhi?’ she asked.

His brow furrowed. ‘Are you kidding me?’

She shook her head. ‘I don’t get it. You’re a bloody model, and I’m… well⁠—’

‘And you’re a sexy, talented, intelligent, and fun woman with an incredible body who drives me insane in bed and who I love spending time with.’ He kissed just below her ear again and she shivered. ‘Does that answer your question?’

She scrunched her face. ‘I have an incredible body?’ She found that very hard to believe. She had always thought herself rather ordinary in the looks department and felt her hips were too big and her breasts matched her hips. Hourglass was what people called it when they were trying to be nice. Fat was what Lily called it on her off days.

‘Take it from me, Lily, you have the sexiest curves.’ He chuckled. ‘And your smile.’ Tingles travelled down her spine as he continued to feather her neck with kisses. ‘And your hair, and⁠—’

‘Okay, okay, I think I get it now.’ She smiled, feeling boosted by his words.

‘Good, well, that’s why I’m attracted to you, but I love you for all of that and more.’

Lily gasped. Shit… what do I say?

He must have noticed the look of horror on her face as he cupped her cheek with his free hand. ‘Hey, it’s okay. I know you’re not, you know, in that place yet and that’s fine. I’ll wait. No matter how long it takes, I’ll wait. Because you’re worth waiting for.’

She felt the familiar sting of threatening tears as she gazed up at the handsome, caring, sweet man before her. More than anything, she wanted to feel the same. Maybe in time. But why the hell did this keep happening to her? Why couldn’t she give her heart? It was so unfair.

Once again, he reacted to the change in her emotions. ‘Hey, shhh, don’t cry, babe. You can’t help wanting to take things slow and I accept that. Come on, let’s have a nap, eh? I probably shouldn’t have dropped that on you when you’re suffering from jet lag, eh?’

She smiled. He was probably right for the most part. Jet lag always made her emotional. That and leaving Adam. But she really wasn’t good company when she was tired. After slipping out of her clothes, she climbed into bed. Bodhi followed suit and climbed in behind her. He snuggled up to her, and with his arm around her waist, he pulled her back into his front. It didn’t take long before she drifted off.

Bodhi really was amazing. He seemed to understand Lily’s need to take things slow better than she could have expected or hoped. She pondered explaining to him why she was so filled with trepidation about their relationship but worried that perhaps her admission would do more harm than good. Perhaps he would run a mile. That wouldn’t be good. The fact that she was worried about losing him made her smile. Perhaps she was beginning to have feelings for him?

Several days after returning to New Zealand she logged onto her email and was reminded about why she could never love Bodhi.

Dear Lil,

Eve and I just wanted to check that you arrived okay. Having seen no news about plane crashes we presume that all’s well and that you’re too busy bonking that Aussie bloke’s brains out to contact us. Okay, Eve says I have to tell you that she had no part in the construction of this email. But you know different, eh? (I’m winking at the screen; with my eyes I hasten to add!) Okay, now I’m in deep shit and Eve is demanding I get off the computer so she can spank me. Oh sorry, not spank me, kick my arse, and apparently there’s a difference! Whoops! Better go.

Write soon, Cheesy.

Hugs, Adders

Lily smiled to herself as she read. Typical bloody Adam. She hit reply.

Hi, Pee Pants and lovely Eve,

I arrived safe and well, if a little knackered. Bodhi has been pampering me for the past few days, and so my body clock is slowly returning to normal. Whatever normal is! We’re going out with some friends tonight, so I’d better be awake by then or I’ll be falling asleep in my beer. Lol! I know that Adders is saying ‘nothing new there then’. Cheeky!

Anyway, enjoy your lovely new home and I’ll see you at Christmas.

Hugs, Lily xxx