Page 88 of X: Command Me through Alexander’s Eyes

Chapter Thirty-Three

Igather her in my arms, her body too spent to hold her up. Then I help her to the grass, glad the day is warm and balmy. Overhead the grey afternoon gives way to the sun, but my mood remains dark. I spread my jacket across the field and help her lie down. She smiles dreamily at me, her eyes blinking slowly as she lifts one arm against the daylight.

I stalk to the horse and check the saddle. I’d crossed a line. Clara doesn’t seem to mind—yet.

There’s that word again. It seems rules don’t matter. I’ll break them. I told her I didn’t need her submission. But I’ve been pushing her toward it slowly and surely, letting the dominance inside me out to play for stolen moments while I look the other way. But that? I just gave him the keys to the cage, and I’m not certain he’ll let me lock him up again.

I turn to find Clara watching me with hooded eyes, her arm shading them from the sun. She hooks her index finger and beckons me over.

I prowl toward her, looking for an apology that might fit the situation on the way. Given that she doesn’t seem to mind the brutality of the encounter, it’s a tall order. I sigh as I move over and realize I don’t know how to apologize to someone that doesn’t know they’ve been wronged. Clara’s gaze is adoring. Undeserved. I force a smirk. “You were giving me a come-hither look.”

She arches against me, her teeth sinking into her lower lip, and I feel the shameful surge of blood pooling in my cock.

“That’s a shame. I meant to give you a come-fuck-me look,” she simpers, bucking her sex up to the bulge in my pants.

“Now I see the difference.” I give in as she reaches to free my cock. She takes it out, her hands warm and soft before she releases my balls and shows them some rare attention. It’s a welcome distraction from the thoughts crowding my head. “Christ, I love it when you play with my balls.”

I need to make her feel good. I need to remind her that I can give her pleasure without such a dark price. I capture her breast in my mouth and begin to suck. She melts into it before she moans, “I want to suck you off.”

The sky darkens overhead again, beginning its slow descent into rest and taking my resolve with it. I push against her, unable to resist the appeal of seeing her pretty mouth wrapped around my cock. I’ll make it worth her while, though. “If you do that, I’ll only be able to fuck you longer.”

“How long do we have?” she murmurs.

Not long now, a shadowed voice says in the back of my mind. I push it away. “Not nearly long enough to satisfy me. I want to fuck you in the twilight and under the stars and as the sun rises.”

“Yes, please.” She licks her lips, doubling down on her mouth’s promise of distraction.

“You’re so fucking hot for me, poppet. Do you know what that does to me?” I push onto my knees, sitting back on my heels, and grab my cock. “You’ve got such a greedy cunt. All I want to do is fuck it. Fuck it hard. Fuck it slow. I want the absence of my cock in your pretty little cunt to feel abnormal. It belongs to me, and I’m going to take care of it as often as I can.”

Clara’s eyes narrow as she crawls toward me. Then I feel the hot lash of her tongue glide up the length of my dick. I clutch her hair and lift her into a kneeling position before standing myself. I keep my grip on her as she starts to suck me off. She isn’t giving me a blow job. She’s devouring me. My eyes close as her mouth closes over my balls until I can’t wait any longer. I pull away to warn her. “I’m going to fuck your mouth now.”

Before I can, she leans forward and swallows my length, taking me so deep I groan. The message is clear. This is about her, not me. She’s claiming me. Through the heady satisfaction each stroke of her tongue brings, confusion sets in. She had been clear about her boundaries, but instead of guarding them, she opens the door each time I push against one.

She fucks me with her hands and mouth until I can’t hold back any longer. But there’s no hesitation when the first spurt of my climax hits her throat. She’s greedy with it, and when I finally look at her, the wantonness written across her face keeps my erection from diminishing in the slightest.

I need her in my fucking mouth now. “My turn.”

I drop to her, lowering her onto her back. She parts for my hips, but I can’t think of anything else but tasting her. I trail kisses down her stomach, stopping on her soft inner thigh. “Do you know why I use the wax seal on the notes I send you?”

She nods down at me. “So they remain private.”

“That’s the practical reason.” I stop and trace her seam with the tip of my tongue. “The crest is an old family one.”

“I had no idea they were so official,” she whispers, so breathily it’s hard to make it out.

“Traditionally, red was used in correspondence to the church,” I explain, my fingers spreading her open like a present. I don’t know how else to tell her what she means to me. I don’t know the words or the actions. I lift my eyes to hers so there can be no mistaking what I’m trying to say. “You are my religion, Clara Bishop. Sacred. Lovely. I want to worship you.”

She gasps when I drop my mouth and begin to do just that. I take my time even as the sun fades and reality beckons. I want to linger in this perfect moment forever. She comes too soon. I love how she clenches against my finger, but I’m not ready for this afternoon to end.

“You taste so fucking good,” I murmur, stealing one last lick. Her thighs clamp against the intrusion, putting my head in a vice grip. I push away, fist my shaft, and stare down at her.

She lays spread before in welcome, legs fanned open, hair haloing her head. Is this the last time I’ll have her? I shut away the unwanted thought. Maybe it doesn’t have to end. Maybe she’s changed. Maybe I have. Maybe I’m too weak to give her up.

There’s only one way to silence my mind. I nudge inside her, and Clara’s head lolls back and forth. “I can’t.”

She trembles beneath me, her body still raw from the last orgasm. I don’t care. I can’t.

“I say you can,” I bite out. Her body agrees with me, relaxing open. I reward her by circling the pad of my thumb over her clit. “Put your legs over my shoulders.”