Page 66 of For the Love of Art

Ilooked out the small window at the sea of fluffy clouds beneath me. They were tinged pink from the early morning light.

At the exact moment I took a steadying breath, the plane shook violently. I gripped the armrests tighter than I was already holding them. Nathan chuckled beside me.

“This isn’t funny,” I said through gritted teeth.

“You’re right, I’m sorry,” Nathan said. “You never told me you were a nervous flyer.”

“I didn’t know I was.”

The plane shook again, and I whimpered.

“How did you not know— oh!”

The realization that this was my first time on a plane washed over Nathan’s expression. His amusement turned to sympathy, and I think I hated that more.

“You and Don never?”

“We drove for vacations. He didn’t like to waste money on frivolous things.”

“I see.”

“He also worked a lot, and apparently, when he wasn’t working, he was sleeping with other women.”

“He was sleeping with more than the one he got pregnant with?”

“Well, I don’t know,” I said sheepishly.

The plane shook again.

That’s it! I can’t do this!

I unbuckled my seatbelt, unsure where to go since I couldn’t just leave the plane. I stepped over Nathan and rushed to the back of the plane. Thankfully, a bathrooms was open, and I locked myself in, leaning against the sink. I closed my eyes as tight as I could.

“Maple, birch, pine.” I started naming trees, a trick Lianne taught me when I got anxious before exams in college.

A knock on the door startled me.

“Isla?”

It was Nathan.

I opened the door lightly and hissed, “Nathan, what are you doing? This is a single occupancy bathroom.”

Nathan looked up the aisle, then quickly pushed himself into the small space.

“What the hell?” I demanded as I fell back on the small toilet. “We can’t both be in here.”

“Says who?”

“The aviation— Gods!”

“You think there is a deity solely responsible for airplanes?”

“I– don’t have time to talk philosophy and religion with you. I need to figure out how I’m going to get the hell off this plane because I will not last the five plus hours we will be here.”

The plane rattled again, and a tear I’d held back slipped. I closed my eyes and hugged myself. I wanted to go home.

I felt a warm finger wipe the tear away. I opened my eyes to see Nathan crouched in front of me.