Page 69 of Lavender and Linebackers

“Yep,” I tell her, grinning. We’ve never joked around or had sexual banter. It was a line we didn’t cross, but I definitely could be on board for more.

“Sit down, and I’ll sit on your lap.”

“We can make more room.” I wiggle my eyebrows up and down.

“Oh my God. You better stop.” She laughs. I love that sound.

Sitting on the bench, I widen my legs so she can step between them. Cautiously, she sits down on one thigh, and I lift her legs to drape over mine.

“Comfortable?” Since she’s so small, we’re basically eye to eye.

“Yes,” she says quietly, her eyes dropping from mine to my lips.

Without thinking, I swipe my thumb back and forth across her thigh. Her skin is smooth, and having her this close is a turn-on that’s affecting me in more ways than one.

The camera in these things goes fast, usually like four to five seconds to change poses, so when Alice hits the button and wraps her arm around me, I immediately know these pictures are not going to be like the rest in the box.

Her eyes lock with mine, and she pulls me down so our foreheads are touching. Hot air and a newfound tension blow between us, as we’re both breathing hard. Does she feel the need to be as close to me as I do with her?

Flash.

Alice tilts her face, and her lips brush across my cheek and the corner of my mouth, where they come to rest. I can’t help the groan that slips out. My hand tightens on her thigh, and I pull her closer. I want her as close as she can get.

Flash.

This time, I grip the back of her head and lean her back a little while lightly kissing her lips.

Flash.

I pull back to see her reaction, and there’s no mistaking the desire in her hooded eyes. It’s a reflection of my own.

Flash.

“Let’s get out of here,” she whispers.

I don’t have to be told twice.

Chapter 23

Alice

Escaping from the picnic is harder than I thought it would be. Ryder is right when he says he worries about the handbook. I didn’t notice the eyes on us last night, but I sure do today. Everywhere I look, people are watching us. Or at least it feels that way since we’ve broken the rules.

It also doesn’t help that everything marketing has us doing looks very coupley.

They told me to wear white, while he’s in a white Tarpons golf polo and navy shorts.

We sit at a table and eat pie together.

We stand with Bryan and Lexi and Jonah and Sophie, and pretend that we’re all laughing and having a great conversation. When, in reality, the four of them talked, and we stood there feeling awkward.

There’s even a cheesy shot of him behind me acting like he’s trying to take the football from me. Well, there is no acting. He went full-on for it. It’s like he can’t help himself given his day job, and we both end up on the ground.

It’s then that I notice Kelli and Sully, Ryder’s captain, are paying extra attention and watching us. It’s like the spotlight that is the sun is shining right down on the two of us, saying, “Look at them. They’ve clearly moved on from just professional.” And the problem is, now I don’t know how to act around him. Am I giving myself away? Can they see that I’m drawn to him, infatuated with him, and overall giddy that things might be changing between us?

I go back to my therapist’s quote, “Anger is an emotion we inflict upon ourselves based on someone else’s actions.” His actions have been pretty good lately, and that anger has dulled. In the beginning, we fought all the time, and now we don’t. It’s really crazy how there is such a direct action/reaction to emotions. Should I still be angry with him after what happened? Probably yes. But am I? Well, today I’m not. What I went through and how I felt back then feels very distant from how I feel today. And if I’m being honest, I’m glad. Living with that negative thread woven through my soul wasn’t healthy, and it’s been holding me back. Holding me back from trusting guys, from letting my heart open not just to new relationships but also to new possibilities, and, well, to feel like the best version of myself.

I pull on Ryder’s arm. He bends down to hear me, as I quietly tell him, “I’m starting to feel uncomfortable.”