Page 26 of Curveball

But I didn't think I could ignore how I felt about him any longer.

I was planning to try to catch Walker before he left for spring training to talk and see where his head was at, but Jake sprung a last-minute Valentine's Day dinner on me, and now I was engaged.

I was such a fucking coward.

I couldn't have said no to Jake publicly; that would have embarrassed and crushed him. We needed to have this conversation about Walker privately, and I’d always planned to; I just didn't think I would be engaged to him when I did it.

Grayson: Congrats Farr… but weren't y'all just in a big fight?

Nate: Mom and Dad told us the news, happy for you guys. That is if you’re happy?

Nolan: Yeah, if you need help getting out of this engagement, let us know… I've got ideas…

Aria: Seriously, Nol? And what the hell is wrong with all of you, way to be happy and support our sister's engagement. How depressing…. but seriously, Farr, you good?

Well, I guess the news traveled fast. It hadn't even been a full twenty-four hours, and my siblings were blowing up our group chat. They all liked Jake, but knew we had been having issues and that I was on the fence about staying with him. I’m sure the news of my engagement was a bit shocking to them.

Me: Thanks! And ya, I'm good, I'm engaged!

Aria: Who you trying to convince?

Nolan: Yikes… that bad?

Nate: Did he really propose to you at a restaurant… on Valentine's Day? What a tool.

Grayson: Yeah, I'm with Nate. He doesn't know you very well, does he?

I sighed heavily at Gray's comment. What the hell had I gotten myself into? I was about to respond when my phone started vibrating with an incoming call from Aria. Luckily, Jake wasn't home, so I could talk freely with her… because I knew exactly why she was calling.

"Hey, what's up?" I answered.

"What about Walker?" Aria wasted no time getting to the point of her call. "I thought you were going to talk to him and break up with Jake?"

"It's not that simple, A. He proposed in such a public place, where everyone knows us. I couldn't embarrass him like that."

"Fair enough, but when are you going to break off your engagement and talk to Walker? Ava said he’s supposed to leave for spring training by the end of the week."

I knew I was running out of time, but the last twenty-four hours had been such a whirlwind, I hadn't had time to even catch my breath, let alone figure out how I was going to talk to Walker, and then Jake.

"Soon. I'm going to do it before he leaves, I just need a minute to figure out how to do all of this." I started to twirl a strand of hair around my finger nervously. I was in so far over my head.

"I get that, I just don't want Walk to hear about your engagement and it be too late." Aria was always a big fan of Walker's, so when I’d told her about Christmas Eve and the time I’d been spending with him, she could not have been more excited about the possibility of a Farrah and Walker reconciliation.

The next day after work, I tried calling Walker to see if we could meet up, but it went straight to voicemail. I tried a few more times with no luck. I was beginning to get nervous that I had missed him; he was supposed to return to Austin to fly out to Florida the next day or so. Desperate, I texted Aria to see if she’d heard anything.

Me: Hey, can you ask Ava if Walker is still in town? I've been trying to call him, and it keeps going straight to voicemail.

Aria: I was literally about to call you to see how your talk went… he went back to Austin last night…

My stomach dropped, and I could feel the back of my eyes stinging with tears.

No, don't freak out yet.

I could still talk to him about everything over the phone while he was in Florida. Not ideal, but it was still okay. This gave me more time to do it the right way and talk to Jake first. The only reason I was going to talk to Walker first was to catch him before he left, but this would actually work out better in the long run. Better for Jake to know first.

…Is what I told myself, until I woke up the next morning to photos plastered all over social media that shattered my heart into a million pieces.

As I was scrolling through Instagram, photo after photo popped up of Walker and a gorgeous dark-haired woman walking hand in hand, leaving a bar. Another photo of them kissing, his hands tangled in her hair.