Page 58 of Unscripted with Mila

“No, I’m fine. It’s nothing.”

“Eat, then. You need to eat.”

I picked up a sandwich, not at all hungry but doing it to make him happy. I tried not to watch him drink the wine, but he noticed.

“Liquor is not a vice,” he said, setting down his glass. “That’s what you’re thinking, isn’t it?”

“I’m sorry,” I said.

He smiled, the expression on his face tight. “It’s fine.”

“Drugs?” I whispered.

He set down his sandwich. “No.”

I was confused.

He sat back, wiping his fingers. “I’m not addicted to liquor, sex, opioids, or pharmaceuticals. I’m not addicted to anything.”

My heart sank. Andi was right—he was in total denial.

“If you can’t admit it, you can’t get well.”

He shook his head. “I will never get well, Mila.”

“Won’t you even try?” I whispered, tears already beginning to well in my eyes.

He laughed, the sound bitter and sad all at the same time. “I am trying, Shortcake. No one knows how hard I try.”

“Tell me.”

He stood and paced around the room. I covered the food, knowing neither of us would touch it. I moved to the sofa, unsure what to do. I wanted to touch him, to stop his restless movements, but I wasn’t sure if I should.

He turned and looked at me. “Do you know why I kissed you earlier?”

I shook my head.

“Because I wasn’t sure if you would let me kiss you again, and I wanted to feel your mouth under mine one last time.”

“We can fight this together,” I whispered.

“I want to believe that.”

He sat across from me, and I dared to reach out for his hand. He grasped mine, staring down at our entwined fingers. He lifted them to his mouth, kissing my knuckles and pressing my palm to his face. He met my gaze, and I saw his pain. His fear. No longer hidden, the emotions bled from his eyes. He was in agony, and I had no idea how to soothe him.

“I’m here. I’m listening.”

He leaned forward and pressed his mouth to mine. Softly. I grasped the back of his head, kissing him back, trying to make him understand I would listen. I would help.

As long as he would allow it.

“I’m not addicted to any substance,” he reiterated. “I drink, but not to excess. I avoid pills unless they are prescribed. I don’t do any sort of recreational drugs.”

“The rehab?” I asked. “Why?”

“I have never been to rehab.”

“What?”