Page 17 of A Beast Captured My Heart

That was my reality, I loved Mattea with all my heart. Only God knows how much I battle with being a better man for her. I’m sometimes ashamed of my condition because I don’t want her to grow up thinking her dad is a mental mess. The way I see it, I refused to bring more kids or another woman into my life like I did with Nia.

“You deserve love baby. All you have to do is go sit down and talk to your doctor so you can get a good therapist. I worry about you, son more than myself. I want you happy, those pretty eyes of yours haven’t shown me happiness in a very long time. Now please tell me what happened for you to bust that girl's mouth open like that. Had me getting blood all over my marble floors trying to stitch her ass up!”

I ran the story down to my mom and she was furious. So furious she went through two more cigarettes before I could end the story.

“Come on in here so I can talk to you both. That girl so caught up in love with you Praise I don’t think nothing I can say will make a change. Listen to me though, you freeze whatever business you have and serve her ass with papers in the next couple of weeks. You need to get custody of my grandbaby she’s not a fit mother in my eyes! Before you start with excuses and street codes, I’m here to tell you that you will do as I say on this. Even if I have to come to Vegas once a week to help you with Mattea. I’m old but not dumb, streets talk Praise and I know you still got a lot of shit going on that you need to wrap up.”

I followed behind her as I texted my lawyer. Every time I got shit smooth in my life some other shit would pop up to make it complicated. Now I would have to wait until Laquanna’s lip healed then take her funky ass to family court. I knew I would win easily because I was paid. Something in me told me that would turn her into a worse lunatic. I still had enemies and other niggas out here in LA testing my gangster. Weeks were passing and they still ain’t felt my wrath. I had niggas moving in on territory because Teflon was too busy doing other things. What those other things were I didn’t know, but it was causing my street shit to look out of tact. I had a million things that needed to be done, like sitting down with the nigga that ran Vegas. I needed to reassure him that I had no intentions of stepping on his toes with drugs in his state. The only thing I wanted to do out there was buy hella property. I loved Cali but Vegas was all about money. Fast money, my goal was to start up the biggest casino and a chain of nightclubs. I also wanted to buy apartment complexes and condos to keep my money flowing nicely before I did make my departure with the streets and its illegal activities.

“Praise baby, I’m so sorry. I just- “

“Sit your hot ass down before I make you melt girl!”

My mom spoke with so much authority she was able to do something I could never do and that’s shut Laquanna’s big mouth.

“Now my son done told me why that lip of yours is meaty. Had I known what you did and if I wasn’t too old, I would’ve given your ass an old school ass whooping, but Praise knows I ain’t raise a woman beater so apologize Praise.”

She crossed her arms over her chest, I bit my bottom lip hard but complied only because my mom made me.

“I apologize Laquanna.”

I said it through gritted teeth. She smiled wide at me like she had one up on me. Little did she know, my mom was nothing to be played with. Leandra was a sweet older lady, when you fucked with her boys she turned into a demon. Laquanna would soon find that out on her own time.

“Now Laquanna, you need to know your worth or find it. I’m not your momma so it ain't my job to teach or show you shit. However, you have my grandbaby, so I’m going to ask you nicely to start acting like a lady... have some self-respect for yourself. Stop trying to keep a man that don’t want to be kept. You should be happy you have a baby daddy like Praise. Most side chick's baby daddies walk right away! Back in my day if a man had a baby outside of his home. The woman didn’t step out of place nor did the kid or the woman bother that man. Even if that woman and kid saw that man out with his family, nothing was said. I know cause my daddy and plenty of other no-good men in my neighborhood lived that way! My son hasn’t led you on in any kind of way. He stresses to you constantly that he don’t want to be with you.”

My mom was going to take it very far so I braced myself. She always was brutally honest. Her words could cut right through to your soul. Laquanna remained seated with a quiet sour face. My mom sparked up another cigarette then continued her talk. All I could do was check the time, and my phone over and over because I still had so much shit to do.

“You looking like an unfit fucking mother to my grandchild Laquanna, and if the both of you can’t pull it together. I’ll take both your asses to court and get full custody!”

Laquanna stood to her feet furiously, I remained quiet. She was making another big mistake.

“I am a very fit mother Ms. Willams! Maybe if you taught your hoe ass son…”

My mom pulled her small deuce deuce from under her rocking chair, she held her cigarette between her thin lips. I wanted to laugh but held it in instead.

“Girl sit your mother fucking ass down before I shoot you! I’m too damn old to be fighting you! Don’t ever stand up in my house like you running shit! Don’t ever tell me either how I should’ve raised my fucking son ya hear? You can raise your kids to be saints and they still go running around the gutters! However you raise your kids, they take the morals and lessons you have taught them and use them how they see fit. Let’s not talk about my parenting because I never left my boys with a complete stranger to see about some dick that didn’t belong to me! You don’t keep the girl's hair combed! You go out all day and night! You lie about being in school just so you can escape the reality of being a mother! Should I go on?”

Laquanna sulked in her seat, all of this was a surprise to me. My mom must have done her own research on Laquanna cause I sure as hell didn’t have the time to see if what she was telling me about school was true.

“I don’t have to deal with this shit!”

Laquanna gathered her things and stomped out the door slamming the door behind her.

“I meant what I said Praise. You better get custody of my grandbaby or I will. She needs a more solid foundation. Now moving on to a new topic what’s going on with you and Michael?”

“I don’t want to talk about it. If Teflon comes crying to you like a little bitch that’s on him.”

Shit with Teflon had been rubbing me the wrong way lately, I was starting to regret even putting his cry-baby ass on. One thing I never did was bring my mom into my street shit. She already knew what I was about but that didn’t mean I came to her with issues.

“Yea ok. You just watch him a little more closely and make sure my baby boy is safe.”

Something inside of me told me some shit wasn’t adding up with him but I was in denial. My brother would never cross me and if he did, he already knew the consequences. I stood to my feet and promised my mom I would look into everything. Teflon was always out here under our momma tittie. I told her I would send for her in a week or two to come up and visit with me and Mattea for a couple of weeks once I took care of other business. Mattea loved her GiGi and would be super happy to see her.

Teflon

Shit was good, so good I had to do another line of coke. Relaxing my nerves, I mentally told myself I shouldn’t be snorting up in the trap house. The way I saw it, I was killing two birds with one stone. I was here to collect money and drop off more product. Standing to my feet I dusted the residue off my clothes from the substance. Going into the crappy ass bathroom that smelled like shit and piss, I checked my nose for any type of evidence. I never planned on anybody finding out that I loved to snort pure cocaine. Only one person knew of my little problem. If Beast bitch ass caught a glimpse of what I was doing he would cut me off entirely. I wanted to get on his absolute good side so he could hand me over his whole operation since he wanted to turn all his dirty money clean. Checking my Rolex, it was time to go. My phone started buzzing and I instantly got agitated.

“What Laquanna!”