Page 6 of Penn

“Before we do that, we need to talk.”

His brows lift. “Should I be worried?”

We walk into the living room, and he sits on the couch, laying his jacket on the overstuffed chair. I hold out a finger before hurrying to the bathroom and grabbing the test, hiding it behind my back. “No, not at all. But I was thinking about us.”

“What about us?” Stephen asks, leaning to get a peek at what I have behind my back. “What do you have there? Something kinky?”

“Depends on how you see it,” I say with a smirk. “But I was thinking about our timeline.”

Frowning, he tilts his head. “Our timeline?”

“Yeah, you know how we’ve talked about getting a place together, and I think we should make that happen. Soon.”

His smile falters just a bit as he blinks at me, and I can’t help but see that he’s trying to pick his words carefully. “Dixie, you know I would love to wake up next to you every single morning. Truly. But we’ve talked about this. I still have almost a full year left on my lease, and I’m always on the road for work.”

“But you keep talking about slowing down,” I say, a sinking feeling settling in my stomach. “You told me you’re tired of always being on the road, and you wanted to settle down. Find something that keeps you local, and if we decide to do this now… it’ll be perfect timing.”

He sighs, and I hate how patronizing it comes across. Like I’m some dreamer child telling him how I plan to buy a unicorn tomorrow and need a stable to keep it in. “It’s not that simple, sweetie. Business is complicated. I can’t just walk away from my clients overnight. We have all the time in the world.”

“Not as much time as you might think,” I say, fiddling with the test in my hand.

“We’re happy like this, aren’t we?”

Swallowing, I nod. “Yes, we’re happy, but things are changing.”

“You’re not happy—”

I shove the test at him, and he stares down at it, his face frozen. His entire body stays still, and the only thing I can hear is the hum of the air conditioner. He’s actually stopped breathing.

I wait for the smile I’ve been imagining since I saw those lines. The gasp of shock and happiness as he pulls me into his arms and kisses me like there’s nothing better in the world.

But rather than the corners of his mouth turning up into a smile, they lower into a frown. And then curve even lower until he’s almost scowling. All color drains from his face, and he looks almost gray. But it’s his eyes when he finally looks up at me that startle me.

They’re not filled with excited tears or shining happiness. They’re cold. Angry. Almost hateful.

“What is this?”

“It’s… it’s a pregnancy test, Stephen,” I say, my voice trembling slightly. This isn’t what I expected. “I’m pregnant. We’re having a baby.”

“How the fuck did this happen?” Stephen snaps, standing and tossing the test onto the couch. He runs his hands over his perfectly styled hair, messing it up, and glares at me. “How the fuck could you let this happen?”

The outburst startles me, and I flinch at his words. “Well, it happened the normal way. We were together. We made love.”

“We were careful!” he shouts and begins pacing. “I wrapped my dick, and you’re on the pill.”

“No, I’m not,” I say. “I had to stop it a few months ago.”

His eyes widen, and I worry they might bulge out of his head. “You what?”

“I told you,” I say, fighting to keep my voice in check as it cracks. “My doctor did tests after learning about my family history, and they found that gene that makes me highly susceptible to breast cancer, and the hormone therapy in the pill increases it significantly. I’m getting a non-hormone birth control, but they were booked out.”

Telling him about my potential risk of breast cancer was terrifying. I watched what my grandmother went through, and it took a toll on my entire family. The moment I tested positive for the gene, my doctor suggested changing up my regimen. He held me and told me it would be okay. No matter what happened, he’d be here.

“I always wore condoms, Dixie. Every damn time!”

“They aren’t foolproof, Stephen,” I say.

It’s like he never took health class in school. According to the school system, the only true form of birth control that is fully effective is abstinence. Which is obviously not what I practiced. Then or now.