Page 14 of Tame Me

“Kay,” I say. “Love you, Tabby. Good night.”

“Love you, too, Reid. Get some rest.”

I go into my room and strip down as I go to my bathroom. I get the water as hot as possible before stepping in. I let the scalding water wash away the memories and bring me to a place where I can relax, even if only for a passing moment. I know Missy won’t stop here, but I won’t let her ruin me—She’s done enough damage.

I am dressed and sitting at the end of my bed. Thane decided we would explore today before we went over his expectations of me. I’d like to think I’ll be fine and be able to follow the rules, but I also know that’s bullshit.

When Thane walks into the room, I sit up a little and look at him. “Good morning,” he says with a smile.

“Good morning,” I reply simply.

“How did you sleep?” Thane asks, gesturing for me to stand.

“Well,” I lie. “And you?”

“I didn’t,” he says, studying my face. “Let’s try this again… How did you sleep?”

“Uh… Not well,” I admit.

“Do not ever lie to me again,” Thane scolds. I grit my teeth and say nothing, because I’ll be a bitch if I reply. “If I ask you something, tell me. You will not be in trouble for telling me you didn’t sleep well, so I expect you to be honest with me. Especially when it comes to your health and well-being.”

“Okay,” I snap.

“That’s ‘yes, Sir’,” Thane corrects simply.

“Oh, fuck you, asshole,” I snap. I turn my back on him, but he promptly shoves me over the bed and yanks my skirt up. I yelp when he smacks my ass and try to move away from him, but he puts his hand on my back to keep me still as he spanks my ass a total of sixteen times. When he moves his hand off my back, he pulls me up. I fully expect him to continue scolding me, but he wraps me in a hug as I cry.

I’m not hysterical or even triggered, so I don’t know why I’m crying. I deserved to be punished, because how else am I going to learn how to shut the fuck up and stop being a bitch? Even after one day, I know the consequences of acting like that.

Thane pulls back and takes my face between his hands. “You spent all night having nightmares, Ayla,” he says, nodding to the camera in the corner of my room. “I need you to tell me these things, Ayla. It is absolutely related to your trauma, and lack of quality sleep is going to affect more than you realize.”

“I’m sorry,” I whimper.

“I know you are, which is why you are here. You want to help yourself, and it starts with identifying when you are upset before you blow up at someone. Your mind is moving faster than your mouth sometimes.”

“I don’t mean to,” I say. “I hate that I'm so… Impulsive.”

“By nature, you are going to be, but that doesn’t mean we can’t work on it to improve our mental health. Our main concern should be managing your anger and self-harming tendencies,” he tells me. “Coping with your symptoms and navigating your trauma is our goal, not curing a diagnosis or rewriting the past.”

“I understand,” I sniff.

“Cussing or yelling at me will result in an immediate punishment of my choosing. Putting your hands on someone out of anger will result in a harsher punishment. You can be mad without yelling, cussing, or hurting someone else,” he explains. “If I tell you to do something, do it. You may ask why and even argue with me, as long as you are respectful. Get an attitude instead of communicating, and you’ll be reminded of who the dom between us is.”

“What about you?” I ask.

“What about me?”

“Do I get to punish you if you act out?” I ask. “If I am required to be respectful, you are as well.”

“How would you punish me, Ayla?” Thane asks curiously.

“Edging you,” I say simply. “Making you sit there and not touch yourself or me while I get myself off. Forced repeated orgasms until you are crying. Get on your knees in front of everyone and apologize. Although that last one would be if you really fuck up… Oh! And if you touch another woman, you get cucked.”

“Oh yeah?” he asks.

“Mhmm,” I say. “By the way, the contract said I am allowed to set my own rules. Within reason, obviously. They have to be run by Reid as well, but…”

“Okay,” he says with a smirk. “We can go talk to Reid before group therapy. First, breakfast.”