Page 50 of Spitfire

"She's in love with you, but she's also in love with me. She won't choose between us, no matter how much you or I would want that."

"Are you prepared to lose her for good, Jasper, 'cause I'm not. I never will be. I've waited fucking years to be with her, and I won't give her up, even if that means I have to put up with you in the picture."

That bit gets my attention again. He's waited years to be with her? As far as I could tell when I dug into his background, there would have been no opportunity for them to meet before this case, never mind having known each other for years. What the fuck is happening here? Something is not adding up.

I pull out my phone. "Douglas, pull everything we have on Xavier Poine, his childhood, education, work life, dig fucking deep. If he's been on a date in the last five years, I want to know about it. Yes, this is about the fucking case! Get me that info!"

I force myself to rise and head back toward the hallway, where we were waiting, wanting to question Xavier myself, now that my brain isn't short-circuiting. The minute I turn the corner, I see Nurse Bree speaking with him, and all my other thoughts flee, leaving my mind only on Scarlett, as I rush toward them in panic. "Ah, there you are! She's out of surgery. They were able to remove the glass, and no organs were damaged in the process. She's being moved to recovery now, and you can see her once she's settled."

I release the harsh breath I was holding, and notice Xavier does the same. He hugs Nurse Bree like an emotional psychopath, and the stern woman giggles like a schoolgirl. "Go on with yourselves, boy-toys. Go grab a coffee, freshen up, and buy your girl some flowers." She smiles in my direction, before winking at Xavier, and disappearing back to the nurses' station. Buy your girl some flowers. She didn't direct that at one of us, instead, it was at both of us. Jesus, does everyone realize what the fuck is happening between the three of us? Everyone but me, apparently?

God, I feel so fucking blind and stupid. She was never going to be with just me. She wouldn't even acknowledge that anything had changed between us. Xavier and I stare at each other, and I can see he wants to say something to me, but I'm at my threshold of the bullshit I can take. I quickly turn around and head in the other direction, hoping to make my way back to my car before my head explodes.

"Jasper, where the fuck are you going?" His voice trails behind me, but I refuse to turn around and acknowledge him. I get in the elevator, and watch as the doors close on his furious expression.

Once I'm sitting in my front seat, I realize I have nowhere to go. I can't leave without seeing Scarlett, and confirming with my own eyes that she's going to be okay. I stare at my reflection in the rearview mirror, and I don't like the man I'm seeing glancing back at me. The one who's desperate to hold onto Scarlett Lyssa, by any means necessary, and is even considering being in a relationship with her while she's also with someone else.

My phone vibrates in my pocket, and I struggle to get it out, in a panic that something changed with Scarlett's condition since I ran like a coward from the hospital. "Garnier," I bark without looking at the screen.

"Agent Garnier, you need to come into the office. One of the techs has picked up something that looks suspicious in Xavier Poine's background," Douglas croaks with anticipation on the other end.

I fucking knew it. "I'm on my way now."

THIRTY-NINE

SCARLETT

"Almost there, Spitfire, just a few more steps." Xavier grits his teeth with annoyance at the fact that I wouldn't allow him to carry me from his car inside my house, his arm wrapped firmly around my back, guiding me up my short front steps. I'm tired of feeling weak, and like an invalid. All the days spent confined to a hospital bed, while I recovered, have put me on edge. Well, that, and I haven't seen Jasper since the day I came out of surgery, and even then he was behaving off.

"I don't understand why you wouldn't let me take you to my place. There are no steps there to climb." I release a frustrated sigh. Round and round we seem to go with the same conversation. The truth is that I'm starting to feel like the walls are closing in around me. Xavier hasn't left my side for more than a couple of hours since I got hurt, and as much as I appreciate the concern and devotion, it's a bit much. On the other hand, Jasper has me so disappointed and hurt with his cold behavior.

I texted him to get an idea of where his head is at, thinking that perhaps guilt over what happened was causing his absence, but he replied in quick, short messages that he was swamped with the case. Swamped with what exactly? I know for a fucking fact that Ashmaker hasn't dropped any new bodies. I've been too busy lying in a hospital bed to do much of anything, never mind go out and murder men, and Xavier has been at my side.

When I try to process how unhinged my life has become and that I might be insane, it terrifies me. The knowledge that there's another version of me inside this body, one who is the polar opposite of everything I stand for, and all my morals. She's a serial killer with a god complex, while I've spent years advancing my career in law enforcement, and catching murderers just like her. Just like me. What does that even mean for my future? Can I even continue to be an FBI agent knowing that I'm a monster? It's all too much. Everything has become such a heavy weight, and I just need a moment of peace, a way to sort it all out and make sense of it.

"You know why, and I'm tired of arguing about it, Xavier. I want to be in my own home, surrounded by my things." I glance in his direction and notice how tense his jaw is, and how he's refusing to meet my gaze. We manage to get inside, and as I make my way to my sofa, I notice the window next to the back door has been repaired from Jasper's break-and-enter. So he's been in my home, but hasn't come to see me in the hospital. What the fuck?

What did you expect from a useless cop?

I roll my eyes at her insolence. I'm a cop, or have you forgotten that? It's become easier and less jarring communicating with Ashmaker in my mind over the last week. It's also helped me to feel less alone, even though her thoughts are often chaotic, filled with darkness, and the need for bloodshed, not to mention she's not exactly a fan of Jasper's. She's now also singing Xavier's praises a lot less since the incident in the shower. I can only guess that she's also feeling stifled by his constant, possessive presence.

"Fucking asshole," Xavier mutters under his breath, and I catch it as I follow where his glance is firmly set. On my small, round kitchen table is a huge bouquet of red roses in a clear, glass vase. Jasper. A bolt of happiness instantly fills my chest. He didn't forget that I was being released today, like I presumed.

"They're beautiful," I comment, the corners of Xavier's mouth dropping with disapproval. The animosity between the two men has only grown since my surgery. I have no idea what happened while I was unconscious. Xavier refuses to answer my questions, and I haven't been able to confront Jasper face to face, but my suspicion is that they had it out somewhere in the hospital, and that's changed Jasper's feelings towards me.

Maybe he's realized that I'm not worth the effort, and what he thought were real emotions and affection were just a mixture of lust, and work-related stress. It feels like blades are stabbing me in my chest, when I think about him not wanting anything further between us. My rage is simmering just under the boiling point to confront him. I wish he was here right now, so I could rip into him and make him feel like shit like I do.

He's not worth it. I'll just hunt him down and kill him for you.

Yeah, no. We don't hunt FBI agents down, certainly not our partners. If he doesn't want anything to do with me, that's his fucking loss. I refuse to pine for a man that uses sex like a weapon. He made me fall for him, even though I knew better, and should have guarded my heart. He's a prolific womanizer, and it seems he's only interested when he's getting his dick wet. Fuck him.

My glance reverts back to the flowers, and if I had the energy to rise from the sofa, I'd throw them out. I could ask Xavier to do it, but that might give him the wrong impression, and right now I'm barely holding back his obsessive need to consume me. The man would climb inside of me and make a home, if he could manage it, which is a very morbid thought considering he's a serial killer, and more than a bit unhinged.

"Let's get you naked and in a bath, Spitfire." He moves towards me with intention, and I have to halt his steps. As much as a bath sounds amazing, I know it will lead to other things, recovering or not. Xavier can't seem to keep his hands off of me, not even in the hospital.

"Baby, spread those pretty thighs for me. I'm starving."

I'm pulled from my dozing by the sensation of Xavier's mouth pressing kisses on the inside of my knee, before he playfully bites the flesh on my lower thigh. "Xavier, what the fuck! We could get caught!" I groan even as I do his bidding, and widen my legs as I lie in the hospital bed, with the quiet white noise of machines all around us, and a bustling hospital just past the closed door of my room.