Page 40 of Spitfire

"PLEASE! NO! LET ME GO! DON'T DO THIS!" I scream, my chest heaving as Tim forces my head to angle, and spits in my face.

"Now why the fuck would we do that, trailer trash, when we haven't had our fill?"

Go to the darkness, Scarlett. It'll all be alright, I promise. You'll survive this, you'll survive it all, and then, I swear to you, they'll all pay, the voice whispers with regret and compassion.

I wake with a start from the nightmare, a scream echoing around the space, as I scramble on my hands and knees. I'm still trapped, still feeling various hands touching me, pulling at my breasts and long hair, and ripping my clothes off me. I can feel someone's fingers inside of me, angrily thrusting, tearing me apart, and I can smell their various scents: sweat, cologne, and the scent of someone's peppermint gum. My skin crawls, at the sensation of fingertips dragging along its surface. Tears cascade down my face as massive sobs wrack my chest, and my stomach heaves.

It was just a dream. I'm safe. I try to convince myself, but neither my mind nor body are cooperating, and I'm right back in that small room reliving one of the worst moments of my life.

You survived. I told you that you would, Scarlett, and I was right. You went to the darkness, and when you returned, you could bear another day, and then another, until we were free. I shielded you, ensured your mind stayed intact, and held us together. I followed through with my promise too. They paid for their sins against us, each and every one, especially Jason.

An image of a decapitated Jason appears in my mind, his body mutilated, his intestines hanging outside of his abdomen, his cock shoved inside his mouth, and his eyes bludgeoned out. My hand is holding his miserable head by the dark hair in my clenched fist, while the rest of his body lies in a deep ditch, surrounded by thick trees as far as the eye can see, and the night sky with brilliant stars shines above.

He was our true first. Our foster father doesn't really count; that fucker was nothing but a happy accident. We made so many mistakes with Jason, but we learned from them and perfected our techniques. We realized quickly it was easier to burn them, than risk leaving something behind that could lead the authorities to us.

"No, that never happened! This is not real! I wouldn't... I…" My voice trembles, and waves of nausea and dizziness assault me. A gruesome carousel of images spins through my mind unbidden.

Don't you remember, Scarlett? It's time you wake up, sweet darling, and take pride in what we've done. All that we have accomplished. We've rid the world of so many monsters, just like Jason and his friends, but there are still more that need our justice.

"Who are you?" I croak, as I lean my overwhelmed body against the nearest wall, my limbs and hands shaking, as I grasp my aching head, that feels like it'll split open like an overripe fruit.

I'm you, sweet darling. The you that needed to survive at all costs. I'm the darkness that you bottled up with every touch, every hurt. I'm the promise of retribution against those who hurt us, and others like us. I'm the fiery justice you were denied.

"No, I'm going crazy. I must have lost my mind. There's no way any of this is real. I need help. I couldn’t have hurt anyone, could I?"

Oh, and who will you go to with your suspicions that you’ve hurt others, huh? Perhaps Jasper? What do you think will happen when he starts looking into your past, and realizes your foster brother, Jason, is still listed as missing, Scarlett? How about his buddies? They all disappeared or died under suspicious circumstances over the years since you left that town? Do you think he'll continue to look at you the same way, or will he think that you're a monster, like the ones he hunts?

She's right, I can't tell Jasper. He wouldn't understand. He's an agent like I am; his first commitment is to the law, and if there's even a chance that I did all these things I'm seeing images of, he would have no choice but to arrest me, regardless of how he might feel for me.

You did do all of them. We did. You can only deny it for so long, sweet darling. It's time you faced our truth.

Truth. Yes, I need to know if I am Ashmaker, if I killed all those men, and so many more from my past. Xavier Poine's face rises in my mind, and I'm reminded that I saw him in a vision when I discovered the carving on my leg. I reach down and rub my fingers across the hot, ragged flesh and flinch at the pain. I need to find Xavier, and force him to tell me if any of that really happened.

He belongs to us, and he protects us at his own peril. He's our other half, sweet darling. With him by our side, we are invincible.

I force myself to my feet, my world crashing down around me as I realize that I'm a monster. That I may have been chasing myself all this time. A tiny part of me is still holding out hope that I've just had a psychotic break, that none of this is real, and it's all in my head. One thing's for sure: Xavier Poine knows more about me than I realized, and that's fucking dangerous.

THIRTY

XAVIER

So pathetic, look at how you're still fuming at being bested by that agent cunt. What did you expect to happen, huh, Xavier? Did you think he was just going to let you have her?

"Shut up, you know nothing!" I shout into the empty loft, my voice filled with rage. "She's mine, she's always been mine, and he'll pay for touching her."

What if she isn't? What if she prefers him to your insanity and obsessive tendencies? What will you do then, Xavier? Will you finally end her miserable, traitorous life, like I've been telling you to do?

"She won't, and I can't. I won't ever let her go or allow him to have her. I've sacrificed too much, waited too long. Without her, the world doesn't make sense, and it's just you and me in the darkness." Hot, burning rage is wrapping itself around all of my nerve endings at his insinuation that Scarlett would prefer Jasper over me. I won't allow that to happen. I won't give her a choice; she's mine or no one's.

Would it really be that awful if it was just us again? We were content for a while. You had your hobbies and your work. We were managing, semi-happy even.

"We were just existing, and barely at that, with no real purpose and too young to understand what we were missing. I don't want to be alone anymore."

I know, Xavier, but is this what you truly want? Chasing and pining for a woman who may never be solely yours? He won't give her up; you saw it for yourself. He's in love with her too.

"I'll make him." My thoughts of cutting Jasper Garnier open, from sternum to asshole, with a rusty knife, and ripping out his heart, are interrupted by a bang on my door that makes my face ache when I grimace, from the punches I took from that cunt. "Who the fuck could that be?"

Probably that agent prick, ready to finish what he started. If it is, you need to kill him, Xavier, or let me have control, and I'll finally get rid of him once and for good. Don't make me take control by force again.