Page 91 of Silk and Sirens

Yes.

I didn’t even need to be on this fucking date. I was only here because Aeris was.

I’d already sent Vivienne a virus disguised as an innocent photo days ago. She’d opened it without a second thought, and now it was deep inside Selene’s encrypted network like a silent parasite. Hendrix was working through it in the background, quietly copying every file, every message, every dirty secret they thought was safe.

Then we’d delete it all.

And once we had what we needed, we were going to make an example of Selene Blackwater, and her daughter.

“Sure, let’s go,” I said, throwing some money onto the table before standing.

Vivienne’s smile was too sickly. “Cool, your place or mine?”

Chapter 38

Aeris

The vomit burned, so forceful I closed my eyes and prayed it would only be the once, and I wouldn’t be spending the next few hours hugging porcelain with Anton’s snores vibrating through the wall.

There was definitely something wrong with me. No sane person felt nothing when she took a life but puked every time she was told to screw someone. Anton hadn’t even been a bad guy. He was friendly, somewhat charming, and smelt nice. Out of the many men I’d been forced to fuck, he was at least in the top five.

But still, every time I performed, I felt … hollow. Like they took something from me I wasn’t willing to give. Until I was nothing but this empty shell.

My stomach rolled, and I pressed my forehead to the cold toilet until it passed.

I was grateful Anton climaxed in my mouth, because my pussy ached. I was pretty sure Caden had bruised my cervix.

Prick, I thought, debating whether I’d be able to shove something up his arse just so he felt what I had. Maybe a bat or something equally as girthy …

I was delusional, but not that delusional. I knew I’d never be able to pin him long enough, but a girl could dream.

Maybe if I asked nicely, he’d let me peg him.

My nausea passed, and I sat back and hugged my knees to my chest.

I was going to kill him.

Condoms weren’t negotiable. Ever. The only times I’d ever been without one was when the men I was told to seduce took me by force. The ones who got off on finishing inside me because I’d begged them not to. Those were the moments that left me the numbest, emptier than when I had to fake pleasure for the worst kind of monsters, emptier than when they broke my bones just to hear me scream.

Because at least the pain reminded me I was still alive.

This … this made me feel like I was nothing at all.

After nights with men like those, I’d always drag myself to my private doctor and get her to run every test possible before making sure my birth control was up to date. But with Caden, I hadn’t even thought about protection. I’d been too lost in the moment, too consumed by him to care.

And the most fucked-up part was I hadn’t felt that same hollow numbness I usually did. When I realised he’d fucked me bare, when I felt him come deep inside me, all I felt was this dark, possessive thrill that made my thighs press together. There was no emptiness, not even any disgust, just raw, terrifying want.

Why the fuck did the only man to ever truly turn me on have to be him?

A heavy vibration, and, lifting my head, I stared at my phone balanced on the sink. Standing, I made sure I wasn’t going to vomit again before glancing in the mirror. My eyes looked tired, the circles beneath dark. My skin was even paler than usual, bringing out the thin, red line down my throat where the blade had kissed me.

Vivienne:

The date went well ;)

She’d sent a picture of her lying across a wide chest, cheek pressed to familiar tattoos that hit me like a knife to the gut. It was stupid, because I knew there was a possibility she and Caden were going to end up in bed together. I was the one that had given her the powdered natural aphrodisiacs.

Vivienne: