Page 52 of Wedding or Not

I swallow. “Yes. They do.”

Something inside me starts shaking, but what I’m expecting doesn’t happen. He doesn’t lean down to kiss me.

Instead, he clears his throat and steps backward. “We better get going.”

CHAPTER 17

The ride home is a lot better than the drive to the restaurant. I ask Wes more about his time in high school, and then he asks me questions about my previous relationships.

I’ve dated on and off since high school, but it’s usually a few early dates and then nothing. Like my ill-fated romance with the intense guy at the college party who took my virginity, it starts and then stops before it barely begins.

I don’t know why. I’ve never known. There’s nothing wrong with me.

I simply don’t inspire the kind of deep passion that causes men to want to commit.

As a sophomore in college, I stumbled into a boyfriend, a nice country boy who basically did anything I said, and I managed to keep him for more than a year until even he decided he didn’t feel the way he was supposed to feel in a long-term relationship.

Then last year I dated a man for almost six months. He was smart and interesting and an electrical engineer, but he lived in Baltimore.

After seeing each other a couple of times a month for several months, he told me bluntly that he liked me, but the commute was too long for anything serious.

That’s the extent of my serious romantic entanglements.

I’m a little ashamed to admit my limited experience. Not because I think Wes will have a problem with it but because it shows me as somehow undesirable.

And I don’t want to be undesirable to him.

But he’s been honest with me this evening, so I’m honest with him too. I give him the full rundown, answer a few questions for clarification, and then wait to see what he’ll say.

“That’s it?” he asks after a minute.

“Yes, that’s it. Why? Is it lacking in some way?”

“No, not lacking. I just always imagined you besieged with admirers.”

“What? Why would you think that?”

“Because you’re beautiful. You’ve always been the prettiest girl around. And it seemed like you went out on dates regularly.”

“I went on first and second dates. Not much past then.”

“That doesn’t make any sense.” He does look baffled. Like there are several puzzle pieces missing that keep the picture from revealing itself.

“Well, I’m not lying.”

“I didn’t think you were. I just don’t understand it. How could a guy who got to go out with you not keep asking for more dates?”

I hide behind my hair for a minute, wanting to sink into a puddle of pleasure and self-consciousness. “I think you might have had the wrong idea about me all this time.”

“I have not. Everyone else is clearly out of their minds.”

I giggle, mostly a cover for a wave of sappy feelings. “I don’t think so, but I appreciate the thought. What about you?”

“What about me?”

“I told you my dating history. Now tell me yours.”

“You probably know most of it.”