Page 138 of Vexatious Queen

“What the hell is your problem?”

He had my hoodie in his fist, and his forearm pressed hard into my chest. Myles planted his leg between mine and was braced like he was ready for a fight. His deep amber eyes were locked on my face, and I wanted to rage at him.

Anger had taken the lead, and it coursed through my body. I glared, wanting him to leave me alone. I was used to wallowing in my pain on my own. I pushed at his chest, feeling trapped.

“Get off of me, man. I need space.”

“What ya need is yer friends. What ya need is Ren and me. Stop sending us away. You’ve always done it, and I’ve always been right here.”

I snorted and looked away, hating that tears stung my eyes. I hated him for making me fucking cry. I hated him for calling me out. I was so sick of crying and feeling like I was the weak link in the group.

“Let me go,” I snarled and pushed against Myles.

But he was freakishly strong and didn’t budge. It was like trying to move a boulder.

“Stop running,” he ordered. “Ya really think I don’t get it?”

I stopped struggling.

“I was assaulted repeatedly by me brother. I felt helpless when Axel hurt Snowflake. And the man, who dared call himself my da, killed me ma and almost took my reason for breathing away from me before I killed him. I still bear the scars of his abuse. I stare at them every time I look in a mirror. Lines faded or not, I can still see worthless carved into my skin and feel the ridges where he threatened to cut me cock off. So yeah…yer not the only one dealin’ with demons.”

His tortured gaze crushed my urge to fight him. Myles always handled everything with a smile and a shrug. It made it easy to forget he’d been through so much. Maybe it was me who hadn’t been a good friend. How could I so easily dismiss the pain he’d lived through?

“Yer ma was the best, and she didn’t deserve ta die. But ya also have those amazing memories to comfort ya. Yer able to smile and know that everythin’ ya accomplish woulda made her proud. She loved you, and you have her warm and caring spirit. Ella would not want ta see ya runnin’ from those who love you because of what happened. Ya know that.”

Myles had been my rock for years, and even when I hid shit, I still counted on him. I’d never seen him as anything more than my friend, but lately something had changed.

“You’re making me want to kiss you again. I’m sorry, but I don’t know how to stop the feeling any more than I can erase all the other crap.”

It made no sense that when I was emotionally charged, he was the one I craved. The connection and need to have him close were different, but just as strong as what I had with Ren. It was confusing the hell out of me.

“Then don’t,” Myles said, releasing his grip on me.

“What?”

“Do it,” he said.

There was nothing teasing about the way he said it or looked at me. My heart hammered as I stood frozen, staring into his eyes.

Myles suddenly punched the wall right beside my head, and I felt the vibration all over my body.

“Do it,” he growled.

The world fell away under my feet. It was Myles and me and all the trauma that we’d shared.

Grabbing his face, I crushed our lips together and sucked in a deep, shuddering breath as the turbulence eased in my chest. Everything about him felt familiar. His scent, his voice, the irritating comments and jokes, but also the unyielding support, even when I didn’t deserve it.

Desperation to escape the insanity had me deepening the kiss and groaning when Myles kissed me back. His hands gripped my hips, grounding me to the earth and him, like a human anchor.

Giving myself over to whatever this was, I flipped us around and pushed him up against the wall.

I didn’t know when Myles stopped being just my friend and became something more. Something that kept my broken pieces from drifting apart. But I knew this much—I trusted him with the mess that I couldn’t survive on my own. Myles and Ren were my people, the ones who kept me afloat when I was drowning, and right now, I needed him to hold me up.

If grief had a language, this was it.

Ren

My head was throbbing.