Page 21 of Monsters and Mocha

He did, and the action came so much easier this time around that Darby yelped in pain as his metal fingers clamped around her fist. He immediately pulled away, revealing dark red marks on her pale skin that were already starting to bruise.

The levity and ease of the moments before immediately evaporated.

You are a monster. You can’t even move without hurting her.

“That was great!” Darby smiled widely as she shook out her hand.

“How can you say that? I hurt you.” The words caused an ache deep in his chest that had nothing to do with his clockwork heart.

She waved the words away. “It’s fine; there’s nothing broken. Besides, did you see how easily you were able to move your fingers?” She stuck her fist out. “Try it again.”

Fitz shook his head vehemently and pulled as far back as he could without falling over, using his legs to push himself so that he was leaning against the wall. Raven, unimpressed with this change of position, flew from his shoulder to the desk. “I don’t want to hurt you again.”

“It’s fine. Now that I know, I’ll be ready.”

“I can’t control it. I don’t even know what I’m touching, so there’s nothing to tell me when to stop. I’m not going to risk it.”

A thoughtful expression passed over her face. “I wonder…” She reached for his right arm.

Her calloused fingers were warm and gentle, and Fitz didn’t resist as she pulled his arm straight to match the other. She adjusted her grip, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze before curling her fingers into a fist underneath his palm. “Grip this hand.”

“This side isn’t the problem.”

Other than the fact that he couldn’t remember the last time he had held a woman’s hand, and it was making his heart rate climb again.

“I never said it was, silly. But I want you to focus on the movement—think about how much pressure it takes, the speed that you move your fingers, the moment that you meet resistance. Good. Now.” She presented him with her right hand again. “I want you to squeeze them both at the same time.”

Fitz hesitated, but one look into Darby’s wide green eyes looking up at him with a mixture of sympathy and trust had him buckling. He moved as slowly as he could, so focused on the minute movements that he didn’t even realize he was holding both her hands until she let out a cheer.

“You did it!”

He blinked. “I did it.” He slowly uncurled his fingers.

“We’ll have to keep practicing, of course. It will take a while before your brain and the magic work together to solidify new neural pathways, but this is all really promising. I’m so proud of you, Fitz.”

Darby stood, throwing a hand behind her to catch herself on the desk as she wobbled. Fitz was instantly on the alert.

“What’s wrong?”

“Oh, just stood up too fast.” She shrugged as if it were nothing. “It happens sometimes.”

He studied her, noting again the dark circles under her eyes and the pale color of her cheeks. He had kept enough extended watches to know sleep deprivation when he saw it, and he kicked himself for not noticing before.

“When was the last time you slept?”

“Eh, I grabbed a few snatches here and there.”

Thanks to her coaching, he was finally able to cross his arms. “That’s not enough.”

She shrugged again, infuriatingly unconcerned with her own wellbeing. “It had to be. For a while, my magic was the only thing keeping you alive, and I can’t maintain it while I’m sleeping. And I can’t exactly sleep while I’m at work.”

“Why didn’t you go home when you were done?”

“Because I came here.”

Fitz shook his head slowly in disbelief. “Go home, Darby.”

She twisted her face in a sassy expression. “And I will, once I check your heart one more time.”