Page 31 of A Filling of Fables and Firelight

The next thing she knew, Kamaran’s arms were reaching across the space between them, pulling her forward until her head tipped against his chest. He wrapped them around her shoulders, and she felt the weight of his head as he rested his cheek on her hair. Rana let her arms hang limply, unwilling to push him away but equally afraid of returning the embrace and injuring him further. Zade rubbed along his legs like an affectionate cat before bounding off in search of his toy once more.

“I’m fine, Rana,” he murmured softly, brushing a kiss to her temple.

“You’re not fine,” she argued into his shirt, only somewhat distracted by the scent of fresh soap and sandalwood. “Someone tried to slice you open like a ripe mango.”

She could feel his laugh reverberating through his chest. “Fair enough. How about I’m not dead, then?”

She closed her eyes, taking a moment to breathe him in, to feel the weight of his arms around her, holding her in place. “I’m glad you’re not dead.”

“I can safely say that makes at least two of us.”

Rana exhaled, gathering her courage as she brought her hands up to push away from his chest. His arms fell away readily, and while she immediately missed them, she couldn’t put off any longer the words she needed to say. She looked up to find him watching her, a soft mixture of wonder and affection on his face.

She breathed deeply, twisting her hands together. “I’m sorry I made you feel like a lizard. You’re not useless or lazy, and it wasn’t fair of me to imply that, especially when I didn’t know you at all.”

“Well,” he said, cracking half a smile. “To be fair, I am rather adept at weaseling my way out of things. I’m trying to be better, though.”

She nodded. “That’s what Jasper said.”

“That page certainly seems to know everyone’s secrets, doesn’t he?” Kamaran shook his head in amusement.

“He has a good heart, though. He wouldn’t use them against anyone.”

“So I’ve seen.” Kamaran pressed his lips together and scrubbed the back of his neck with his right hand. “I also owe you an apology.”

Rana shook her head vehemently. “You don’t. You’re not the one who insinuated that I was a reptile.”

“But I overreacted. I shouldn’t have spoken to you the way that I did. I was just…” His voice trailed off and he swallowed thickly before continuing. “I guess the idea hit a little too close to home. I’m well aware that I’m not exactly Sultan material, and though I’m used to being a disappointment to everyone I just…I didn’t want to be a disappointment to you, too.”

Her nose wrinkled in confusion. “Why would you think you’re not Sultan material? You’re charming and you’re smart and⁠—”

“I’m not smart.”

“You are! I’ve been watching you. You⁠—”

“I can’t read, Rana.”

“...What?” She blinked, caught completely off-guard by the tumbled words of his admission.

He shoved an agitated hand through his hair. “I can’t read. That is, I know what the letters are supposed to mean, but they never work for me the way they do for other people. They’re always blurred together or backwards, and I can never seem to keep track of where the words are supposed to be. It takes me hours to get through a single page. When I was a child, it was fairly easy to get around by just memorizing what was on the pages as my tutors read them to me. That didn’t work as well as I got older and was expected to be more independent, and it was easier to pretend I didn’t care and couldn’t be bothered than it was to admit the truth. So there you have it.” He laughed bitterly. “Not only am I irresponsible, but I’m stupid as well.”

“Oh, Kamaran,” she breathed, her heart aching for him as pieces of his puzzle began to fall into place. “You’re not stupid.”

His jaw worked back and forth as he gave her a sad, angry glare. “I don’t want your pity.”

She popped one hand on her hip. “Since when is stating facts equal to pity? Are you once again adding definitions to the Adhavian dictionary?”

“There’s something wrong with my brain, Rana. It doesn’t work the way it should.”

“You’re right. It doesn’t. You shouldn’t be able to walk into a room full of strangers and almost immediately know the right words to say to make people smile and feel comfortable. You should have far more trouble than you do putting on and off the mask that means you set your emotions aside in favor of what you think the people of your kingdom need from you.”

He shifted his weight. “That doesn’t mean anything.”

“It means that you’re incredibly smart when it comes to people, which is arguably more important. Not to mention the fact that you implied that, as a child, you were able to memorize entire pages by having someone read them to you. That’s not a simple thing, Kamaran.”

“You really expect me to believe that being able to talk to people is more important than being able to read basic text?” he scoffed. “I’m the Sultan.”

She lifted her arms in a shrug. “Which just means that you have the resources at your disposal to work around it. Don’t you already have a secretary? Just have them read things for you. Or designate someone else for the job. You have an entire palace full of staff.”