Page 26 of Knot So Social

Tracey clicks her tongue, staring at the TV. “Damn.”

My pulse leaps in my throat and I curl my hand into a fist to quell the shaky sensation in my fingers. That’s why he called three times yesterday. I’m such an ass.

I try to rise, but Tracey holds me down. When she leans forward, reaching for my cock, I block her mouth. “Babe, I need to go see if he’s okay.”

The look on her face is something I’ve never seen before. Harsh, accusing. I recoil.

She smooths over the look, turning pleading instead. “Right now? When I’m giving you a blow job? Please, just wait until we’re done here, Joel. It’s been so long since we had sex.”

Her tone lands the wrong fucking way in my gut. Yeah, we need to connect, but the way that big truck’s up on the dividing wall and crumpled on one side says it was no simple accident.

“He’s my brother!” My voice rises. “And he’s in the fucking hospital!”

Tracey flicks her hands away like she doesn’t want to touch me and rocks back on her heels. “Go on, then. Go running to that loser.” She crosses her arms. “But I swear, if you go now, we’re done.”

Ice stabs at my soul. “What?” I gasp.

Her finger arcs through the air toward the door. “You heard me! Leave in the fucking middle of this . . . this shit, and we’re through.”

She can’t mean that. It’s just a stage we’re going through, nothing to rock the upcoming marriage. So why? Where did I go wrong? I lever myself up out of the chair and pull on my pants, my chest hollowing out as I tidy my clothes up.

“Babe, you don’t mean that.” Iron-hard bands constrict my lungs.

I can’t drive another woman away.

“Try me, you selfish bastard.”

I stare at her, unable to catch my breath. I don’t understand. “You . . . you don’t throw that around like an ultimatum. Not when you love someone. We’ve promised to be together.” I close the distance between us. “Please, Tracey. He’s my brother, and he’s been in a car crash. He doesn’t have anyone else.”

She jerks her face away from me, jaw rigid. “I thought you were making things up to me after scaring me last night, but it turns out I’m a joke to you.”

A joke? Why does she keep using the words that hurt me the most? I don’t think I’ve ever told her what happened with the omega I drove away and yet it’s like Tracey knows exactly how to gut me right through.

None of this is a joke to me. I do everything possible to show her that I’m serious, that I love her, and I want us to be together.

Something is wrong.

A strange silence descends between us, charged like an electrical storm. Tracey’s cheek ticks in and out, while her body stays as unmoving as a rock. She means it. This isn’t some emotional outburst or even a phase we’re going through; she’s actually considering leaving me.

How the hell did we get here?

Is this all because I want to go see Joel in the hospital? Because I set aside our sex for him? Or does it have something to do with what’s been going on between us in the past few months? My mind scrambles, no answers coming for the onslaught of questions.

The one reality that rises to the surface is that it’s happening again—I’m screwing up my relationship. But this time, I can’t figure out what I did wrong. A mental warning not to release my scent clamors through my brain, drowning everything else out.

My knees weaken and I fall back a step.

“We’re good together, aren’t we?” I whisper. “I do everything you ask.”

Apparently, that’s the wrong thing to say. Tracey rears back, fire blazing in her eyes. “What I want? Are you fucking kidding me? We do everything according to your timetable.”

“But that’s my job—”

Tracey stabs a French-manicured finger into my chest. “I wasn’t finished. You never make decisions for my benefit, and you never invest in our social life. Shit, I have to drag you everywhere like I’ve got a lasso around you. Do you think this is the life I want, Joel?”

Yes? I mean, she agreed to marry me, knowing I’m more reserved than she is. But clearly not.

I shake my head, the room distorting. “I . . . I mean, where is this coming from? Then what . . . what life do you want?”