Page 29 of Be My Summer

Fresh ink.

Front and back.

I peeped around the porch, hoping to steal a glance of the man responsible for the smile on my face. A part of me saddened as I realized he was long gone.

“I like him, Sums.”

My father’s admission startled me. I had quickly forgotten he was sitting in his favorite chair, reading his favorite columns.

“Me, too, Dad. Me, too.”

I took my belongings into my room, excited to see what was underneath the kraft paper Saul had carefully wrapped each piece of literature in. I removed the tulips and held the thick stack in my hand. On my bed, I began tearing into the paper, feeling like a kid on Christmas.

Ashes of our Hearts

Bennie + Loe

Broken Hearts are Mending

Heated Arrangement

Half Interested

Five new pieces of fiction were beneath the wrapping paper. I held them close to my chest, trying to calm my raging heart.

“You’re after my everything, Mister Saul.”

The way to a girl’s heart was literature and he had provided plenty. I sat my new pieces aside and slid the handwritten letter from the ribbon. I unfolded the paper and was immediately overcome with emotions.

I laid it on my legs, promising to collect myself before reading. However, the realization that someone, a stranger, had taken the time to present me with so many of the things I loved –words. They were plentiful, and for once, I didn’t want to pick them apart. I wanted to enjoy them for what they were. For what he meant.

Miss Summer,

I’ll admit that it’s pretty intimidating penning words for someone whose job is to critique them, but hopefully I’ve done well. I’ve had this on my mind for days now, but each time I sit down to put my pen to the pad, I think you’ll reject my work. But, here goes nothing.

Or maybe it’s everything.

Hopefully, it’s everything.

Have you ever sat atop the Hills and watched the sun as it sets? It changes from a bright yellow-ish orange to the prettiest purple-lish color before fading to black.

I’ve seen that sunset. I know how it feels. And, as I watched it yesterday, I wished you were beside me so that I could properly explain while you experienced just how my days have been since I met you two weeks ago and how I want them to end.

I imagine the sunrise is your entrance. Together we’re the brightest… yellow-ish orange. We’ll be the prettiest purple-ish color as we age and grow old. Until, finally, everything fades to black.

It sounded so much better in my head, but now that it’s on paper–shit, whatever.

I stopped, chuckling at the analogy he’d made. I understood what he was saying. I knew exactly what he was feeling and what he’d experienced. He was right. Everything he’d said reminded me of the sun’s cycle.

In other words, my days are so much lighter knowing you’ll be at the beginning and end of each of them. I wait by the phone for your calls and texts. I hold my breath each time I call, hoping I’ll find you on the other line.

I run my hand across the empty side of my bed, anticipating the day you’re there. I peer at the emptiness in my closet, wondering what you’ll fill it with when the time comes. I go on my morning runs hoping I’ll bump into you again.

It’s been two weeks and I’ve quickly determined I don’t want to spend a day without you in my life. Your gentleness is so refreshing. Your smile is awakening. Your touch is grounding. Your voice is soothing.

Summer, you are everything I imagined you would be. Everything I’ve ever wanted in a partner. A life partner. A wife.

Though we haven’t reached that point yet, I know it is coming. I’ve already reserved the day in my calendar. But, first, there’s something I need to ask you.