Page 17 of Crusher

My heart stutters at his anger, and that realization is building to the point I feel like I’m suffocating.

“Alexiana, brother,” Linc says softly.

“What about her?!” I hear him, before he urges, “What happened? Have you found her?”

“Here,” Linc says softly before I hear, “Hello?” with urgency, and for a split second, I second-guess myself yet again, the photos, the baby.

It was definitely him in the first photo, the one of Roxy riding him, my name was clear as day on his neck, he did sleep with her, not even a week after I left, after he chose his club, he allowed her to touch him, then the one of him holding the baby, all the photos of her in his arms…

“Hello?” Hayes snaps before he says, “What the fuck is this, you two? Is this your way of getting me to stop fighting?”

“Fuck, brother, it’s not like that, Blaze said…”

I cut who I’m guessing is Knuckles off as I whisper, “Hayes?”

“Freckles?” Hayes chokes full of emotion, and my tears fall as he pleads, “Freckles, please tell me it’s you, fucking please…” Before I hear, “Shit,” then a grunt, and my breath stutters.

Did he fall?

“It’s me,” I croak, and I hear him sob, and I squeeze my eyes tight as I grip my phone.

“Fuck, baby, I’ve missed you, I’ve missed your voice,” he chokes just as I hear a bang before Linc snaps, “Roxy, you’re b –”

She cuts him off and gasps, “Baby, are you hurt? Let me see you…” and I squeeze my eyes tighter before hearing a kissing noise, and I quickly hang up and drop my arm, and that realization disappears, and the urge to curl up in a ball hits me.

So, he is with her after all?

I just wanted to go with the narrative in my own head, yet he said, his emotions…

Is she just hanging around him?

Is he using her because I left?

God, my head is scrambled.

My old phone vibrates, and knowing what I need to do, knowing this just cements it. I need to cut him loose for not just my sanity but also his and for our son’s sake knowing that woman would try and ruin my child. Let’s face it, jealous women are like that, I throw my phone on the floor before stamping on it several times, ensuring it’s unusable.

“Mama, is it snack yet?” I hear Kayden shout from inside, and I take a deep breath before picking the old phone up and wiping my tears. I walk inside, set the phone aside, and ask my son, “What would you like, trouble?” trying to keep my voice light, not wanting to worry him.

My son, like his father, is unpredictable, and I don’t need him going on a hunt for whoever hurt me. Knowing my luck, he’ll put tacks on his teacher's chair again after the man asked me out, and Kayden wasn’t too happy about it.

He has a romantic fairy tale in his head that his dad will come and find us, that we’ll be a family after I explained that he had to work away, but that he loved him very much. Heck, he even has a few photos on his bedside table of his dad on his Harley, even the one of our wedding day, but how do I tell my seven year old that his dad cheated and chose his club?

How do I tell him we won’t end up together? That there is a good chance he’ll never meet his dad?

I can’t, can I? Not without breaking his little heart, and honestly, hurting Kayden is the biggest fear I have.

“Hmm, spaghetti and meatballs,” my troublemaker says, and I smile slightly and confirm, “Alright,” and he fist bumps the air.

He’s my reason for living, he’s my reason why I continue every day, and he’ll be the reason why I’ll learn to trust one day again, just not with his father.

Hayes has his own life and family now, so maybe it’s time I had mine.

Chapter 8

Crusher – Two Days Later

I grip my handlebars as I look in my mirror, eyeing the white van that has been following our group back from meeting the Dark Angels MC, suspicion building while my wife’s whisper echoes in my head. The soft note of her voice that I missed so fucking much when she confirmed it was her on the other end of the phone. The reason why Knuckles told me to knock my opponent out, that it was an emergency and fuck, so many emotions rushed through me hearing her voice, hearing that she called me after I exploded on her voicemail but then she hung up. She heard that bitch call me baby, she heard that bitch throw herself at me and kiss me after she barged into the locker room. She was eaves dropping and heard me speaking to my girl and she fucking ruined me finding my wife who has officially disconnected her old number.