Page 266 of A Matter of Time

“I know what you want,” I muttered as I stood up and put on my jacket.

“What are you doing?” he asked suddenly.

It seemed obvious. “I’m leaving.”

“Why?” he asked, reaching out to grab hold of my wrist.

“I forgot how bad you and your friends make me feel about myself.” I yanked my arm free of his grasp. “I’ll see ya later. Thanks for dinner.”

“Jory—”

“Bye,” I yelled at the table, smiling before I turned and left the room, dodging the waiters coming in to serve more food and drinks. I made it down the staircase to the restaurant and then snaked my way through the crowd to the door. On the street I felt instantly better, less claustrophobic, like I could breathe.

“Jory!”

I turned and found Aaron.

“Where are you going?”

“Home.”

“Why? What did I say that’s not true?”

“Nothing,” I said, turning to leave.

“Jory!” he snapped, grabbing my arm tight, holding on. “I hate these damn dramatic exits. Just for once, stay and fight. You always run.”

I shrugged. “So find someone who’ll stay. It doesn’t seem that hard. You get tons of guys hitting on you all the time, just pick one already. That guy Kellen thinks you’re plenty hot.”

“Jory—”

“Lemme go, Aaron,” I said tiredly. “I’m not the guy for you, and you’re definitely not the one for me. Let’s just call it a day.”

“God!” he roared, the frustration just rolling off him. “Why do you have to fight me all the time? Why can’t you just listen to me, since all I want is the best for you? You could be so happy! I could show you so many things and places and⁠—”

I peeled his hand off me and took a step back. “I don’t need that.”

“What do you need? Do you even know?”

I didn’t, but I knew for certain it wasn’t Aaron Sutter. I had to trust in order to love, and I didn’t trust Aaron. He wanted to change me, and I was afraid if I stayed with him, I would lose myself along the way.

“Jory? Tell me the kind of guy you need and I’ll be that guy.”

I shook my head. The only man I had ever loved so completely that every wall in me had come down was Sam Kage. I was a mess, sometimes, and he had been my rock. I needed that. I needed to be able to surrender and just be. But it would sound desperate and codependent if I gave voice to it, so I just stood there silently.

“Jory, please. I thought about you every day I was gone.”

When he took a step forward, I took another back. I wasn’t going to let him touch me anymore…there was no point. I had my doubts that we could even be friends.

“Jory…honey.”

And Sam was an even worse prospect, because as much as I wanted him, he was no good for me. It was funny—the guy I didn’t want would stay forever, and the guy I did want would end up leaving me again, if I allowed him the chance. I needed a drink.

“That’s your answer for everything.”

I hadn’t realized I’d said it out loud.

“What you need is to come home with me and spend the weekend. We need to talk.”