Page 98 of Frosted Fakes

Elliott didn't look up from the book she'd been staring at for the past hour. The same page. The same paragraph. The words had stopped making sense around minute forty. "I'm reading."

"You're moping," Shay repeated, dropping onto the sofa beside her. "You haven't turned a page in forever. You've got that look on your face like you might want to fight someone. It’d better not be me."

"It's not you," Elliott sighed.

"Good, because we’ve already established the fact that you push people away. And I don’t like being pushed. So, tell me what’s going on in that little head of yours."

Elliott finally closed the book. It wasn't like she was actually reading anyway. "I'm stuck." The words sounded… sharp. Good. Bad. She wasn’t sure. Honest, definitely.

"With… Julia?" guessed Shay.

"With the cookbook." Elliott's jaw tightened. "You’re right. It's finished. Has been for ages. But I don't know what to do with it now. I don't have an agent. I don't have connections. I don't have…" She stopped.

"You were going to ask Gabby," Shay said quietly. "Weren't you?"

Elliott's silence was answer enough.

"So let me get this straight." Shay shifted to face her properly. "You were working up to asking Julia's mum for help. And then Julia went and asked for you. And you're angry because…?"

"Because she did it behind my back! She didn't even ask me. She just decided I needed saving and…"

"And then did exactly what you were planning to do, anyway?"

Elliott opened her mouth. Closed it.

"Oh my God." Shay let out a disbelieving laugh. "Elliott. You absolute idiot."

"Don't."

"You're not angry that she asked Gabby for help. You're angry that she did it before you could. That she beat you to it." Shay shook her head. "And instead of saying 'thank you' or 'that's what I wanted anyway,' you blew up at her and walked out."

"It's more complicated than that."

"Is it, though?" Shay asked. "Because from where I'm sitting, it looks pretty simple. Julia loves you. She wanted to help you. She went about it the wrong way, sure, but her heart was in the right place. And you punished her for it because you're so determined to do everything alone that you can't stand someone caring about you."

The words stung. Elliott wanted to argue, to defend herself, to explain all the reasons Shay was wrong. But the arguments wouldn't come. Probably because Shay wasn't wrong.

"Not everyone is out to get you," Shay continued, gentler now. "Some people love you and want to help you be the best version of yourself. And if you can't see that. If you keep pushing away everyone who tries to get close, then you don't deserve someone as lovely as Julia, anyway."

Elliott stared at her. She'd been so proud of doing everything alone. So determined to prove she didn't need anyone. She’d pulled her life back together, gotten a job, a career, written a cookbook, for god’s sake.

Except… she hadn't done it alone, had she? Milly had given her the kitchen, the training, the love. Shay had been there through every crisis. And Julia… Julia had believed in her from the start, even when Elliott had been nothing but prickly and difficult.

Elliott let out a breath that felt like it had been trapped in her chest for days. "I made mistakes."

"Big ones."

"But I don't…" Elliott looked up at her friend helplessly. "I don't know what to do with that information."

Shay reached over and squeezed her hand. "Figure it out, El. Because right now, you're miserable."

Elliott sat with that long after Shay had left the room.

Just what was she supposed to do now? All she could see around herself was endings. The future was… boring. Just like Milly had said. Quiet and lonely and very, very scary.

Chapter Thirty-One

If she was going to be publicly humiliated, of course it was going to happen on a day she hadn’t washed her hair.