Page 194 of The Fire We Make

“I don’t know when it happened, but at some point I lost focus of my goal and why I'm here. I want to be here… but I need to be there.”

“When are you gonna live for you though, Rose?” Ace asked, moving a strand of hair out of her face.

Joy shook her head. “You and I both know that’s not how this works.”

“This shit can go however you want. I’m not gon’ tell you what to do, but I’ve heard you talk about what they did to you. Woken up in the middle of the night to you having nightmares about what they put you through. Why would you want to go back to that?”

“Because it’s mine. I built it and earned it. Why would I just give it up? Especially now when they need me.”

“That man exiled you and told you to your face that he’d let your enemies kill you. And now you wanna run back because they need you? You deserve more than that Rose. I can give you more than that.”

Joy blinked rapidly to ward off the tears that threatened to spill. The truth of his words settled into her soul but her mind, filled to the brim with a lifetime of her father’s teachings, rejected it.

Joy pulled back from Ace, taking her rings from his hand and slipping them on.

“Come on. We should head out before we’re late.”

With one last fluff of her hair, she left Ace standing there.

Joy cackled at the senseless argument between Von and Ace as she sipped on her fresh glass of bourbon.

The earlier heaviness of she and Ace’s conversation had melted away, replaced instead with the levity of being surrounded by people that felt like home.

Her entire body froze as the thought passed her mind. She glanced around the table at the people who’d welcomed her without asking for anything of her but to be herself.

It dawned on her that the reason she’d lost focus is because she’d found them.

Found him.

As if he knew she was thinking of him, Ace’s hand found hers under the table.

Joy looked up at him, finding his eyes already on her with a soft smile on his lips. He didn't have to say a word for Joy to know what he was saying.

This is more.

Dinner and dessert passed in a blur of laughter and stolen touches before the staff cleared the table and everyone migrated to the sitting room.

“Hate to put an end to this great night but we have some business to discuss,” Ace said during a lull in conversation.

“I understand,” Ella said, waving him off. “Y’all are dismissed.”

The siblings rose one after the other, the earlier smiles flattening.

Joy stood from where she’d been perched on Ace’s lap to allow him up, then claimed his seat when he made his way to the hallway that would lead him to Zachariah’s office.

Joy watched as Ace reached his hand behind him, beckoning for her.

Only when his hand remained empty did he realize she wasn’t standing beside him.

He turned with questioning eyes.

“You not coming, Jane?” Von asked, all of them stopping and turning to face her.

“No,” Joy shook her head. “I don’t want to impose.”

Ace’s brow furrowed and he opened his mouth to speak before he could, April did.

“Girl, come on! You’re practically family,” she said.