Page 58 of I’ll Find You

Chelsea reaches out, brushing her arm lightly and giving it a little pat. “You always do.” Lucinda nods again, but she doesn’t look back at us. We fall into step together, the three of us moving down the hall, our footsteps echoing against the tile. Chelsea walks between us, just like she always does. She’s an easy buffer, filling the silence with easy conversation that focuses on rounds and schedules.

Lucinda doesn’t say much at all at first. I can feel it though. It’s in the way that she keeps glancing over at me when she thinks I don’t notice. I can tell she’s working her way up to something, and I’m pretty sure I know what that something is.

“So,” Chelsea says lightly, glancing between us. “How’s everything going with the fundraiser preparation?”

I blink. “The five mile race?”

She nods. “Yeah. You’ve been helping plan it, right?”

“Yeah,” I say. “It’s finally coming together.”

“That’s amazing, Rose,” she says warmly. “The shelter really needs it.”

Lucinda nods. “I’ll come,” she adds quickly. “I mean it. I want to support you.”

“You don’t have to,” I say.

“We want to,” Chelsea says with her mind made up, cutting them off. “Just tell us what you need.” She tilts her head slightly. “What time are you planning to start?”

“Well, in the afternoon. It’s a sunset race. It gives people the opportunity to visit the beer tent and local pubs later on St. Patrick’s Day.”

Chelsea nods, filing away all the information. “That’s perfect.” There’s something in the way that she says that gives me pause, but as we get to the stairwell door, she stops abruptly when she sees Lucinda move beside me.

“Rose.” Her voice is hesitant. Chelsea looks between us, stepping out of the middle and picking up on the words hanging in the air between us.

“I’ll catch you guys later,” she says gently, before opening the door to the stairwell that leads to the inpatient floors, giving us the space without making it into a big deal.

It’s just the two of us now, standing there in an uncomfortable silence that stretches until Lucinda breaks the tension. She exhales, dragging a hand through her hair before speaking.

“Look. I’m really sorry,” she says, the words coming out too fast. I wonder how long she's been working up the courage to say them. She continues, “About Maxwell. About that night and things I shouldn’t have—” She stops herself, shaking her head and closes her eyes before returning them to me. “It was a mess, and I handled it so very badly.”

I don’t interrupt. She glances at me, then away again. “I’m seeing someone now,” she adds. Maybe she thinks I care, and it makes up for it. Does she really think I want him back now? I shiver at the thought. “It’s different. Better, I think.” There’s something in the way that she says it, making me wonder if she is trying to convince herself or me, but I won’t give her anything. She doesn’t deserve it. “I’m just—I don’t want things to stay this way between us.”

We keep walking toward the lobby. “I get it,” I say after a moment. “Things were complicated, but what you did was inexcusable. You were supposed to be my friend. I don’t think we could ever be the way we were, but I don’t hold it against you anymore. I’ve let it go. I’m seeing someone that I—” I smile thinking about Alex, and how love doesn’t really even sum it up properly. “I’ve met my person,” I tell her, because that’s what he is to me. He’s my friend. My lover. My forever.

It’s not forgiveness. Not entirely, but it’s enough to keep moving forward, as I wish her the best. Lucinda nods, relief easing some of the tension she was holding onto as her shoulders relax.

“Yeah,” she says. “I know.”

I’m about to walk off when Lucinda grabs my shoulder, stopping me. I turn toward her, and she looks around before speaking. “Hey, just be careful with him.” My eyebrows rise, and my forehead scrunches. I frown slightly. Is she trying to tell me about Alex?

Lucinda must see my confusion because she says, “Dr. Somersworth.” Her jaw tightens. “He’s not exactly…” She exhales, searching for the right word. “...great with boundaries.”

I study her. “What does that mean?” Lucinda huffs out a breath. “He’s divorced,” she says. “From his wife and from what I’ve heard…it wasn’t amicable. He has a lot of affairs.”

I raise a brow. “That’s⁠—”

She shrugs. “Rumors,” she cuts in quickly. “I know, but still. There’s always a little truth mixed in, right? You know?” Her eyes flick back to mine, more serious now.

“Just don’t get too close to him. Or trust him.”

I nod slowly. “Okay.”

Lucinda straightens—a faint frown on her lips. “I’m probably overthinking it,” she adds, mimicking Chelsea’s words, but she doesn’t sound as though she believes them.

Chapter

Thirty-Four