Page 6 of His Fake Fiancé

After a few minutes, she tucked the notebook and pencil into the bedside table drawer. Her thoughts were too chaotic to settle down into anything coherent. And she wasn’t feeling the least bit inspired.

With a sigh, she picked up her MP3 player. While she usually preferred to listen to records—she loved the hiss and pop of the vinyl—sometimes what she really needed was music loud enough to drown out the world. She popped in her earbuds and pressed play. The beginning strains of Fleetwood Mac’s “Landslide” began.

Someone knocked on her door. “Chicken?”

“Go away, Linc.” She cranked up the volume.

Usually, the beautiful weave of the notes and lyrics were enough for her to get lost in. But not tonight. Tonight they fell by the wayside, overrun by thoughts of Jake and that terrible, incredible kiss.

All her fantasies—and over the years there’d been plenty—had never come close to the reality of having Jake’s lips on hers.

The kiss had been unexpected, and she’d been startled. So much in fact, that she’d frozen. And then he’d run his tongue along her bottom lip, and every single one of her nerve endings blazed to life. She’s opened for him. Let him in. And she felt alive for the first time in forever.

She lifted her fingers to her lips. They still tingled, like the kiss was imprinted on them permanently. She could still taste Jake on her tongue, all rich and dark, like expensive whiskey or the richest, most decadent chocolate. And she felt a craving growing, deep down inside. Would a craving this intense ever be fully satisfied? She had a sneaking suspicion the answer was no.

And then, while she was plastered against him, sure he could feel the thud of her heart in his own chest, he’d slid his hand down to her butt. She’d freaked out and pushed him away.

With a groan, she rolled over onto her side to stare at the wall. She was such an idiot. First for telling Jake she’d go along with this ridiculous engagement idea, and then for getting caught up in the whole thing and letting him kiss her. The sane, rational part of her knew the only reason he’d done it was because he was trying to manipulate the narrative in regards to Olivia and the whole custody thing. No one was going to believe she and Jake were together if they didn’t show some physical affection to one another.

She knew she was playing with fire, and it was her that was going to get burned to ash. But she couldn’t help it, could never help it when it came to Jake. She’d loved him for as long as she could remember, ever since he’d punched Tommy Siegler in the nose in the first grade for making fun of Claire for not having a mom. Long before she even truly understood what love was.

When they were kids, they were inseparable. They spent all their free time together, and a deep bond formed between them. They confided their secrets to each other, often in the dead of night during a sleepover, when it was dark and it felt safe. Jake knew about the guilt she carried, and the frustrating way her family treated her like she was helpless. She knew how he often felt smothered by his mom, but completely ignored by his dad, and how he considered himself mediocre when compared to his more accomplished brothers.

He never judged her or told her she was doing everything wrong, which was often what happened at home. And in turn, she accepted Jake for exactly who he was, and never compared him to anyone, or tried to change him. He was the type who did everything with his whole being, and felt it deeply when he got hurt. Not that he showed that side of himself to the world. But she got to see it, all the sensitive and insecure bits he hid under the carefree persona he’d adopted.

As they grew older, her feelings changed, shifting from friendly into something more. Something deeper. Something that scared her. Both because she was afraid Jake didn’t feel the same, and because if she told him how she felt, she would lose him. So, she’d kept quiet, bottled up her feelings, and pretended to be okay with just being friends.

Lifting her left hand up, she stared at the ring. The single diamond sparkled in the lamp light. She tilted her hand back and forth, watching the light play off the stone. It was beautiful, and she ached a little—or maybe a lot—that it was all fake.

A happy ending with Jake was what she’d wanted for as long as she could remember. It crushed her that it wasn’t real.

This was a huge mistake.

Tomorrow she’d tell Jake she wasn’t comfortable with this whole thing, and give him back the ring. He’d be disappointed, but he’d understand. He had to understand.

But tonight, in her bedroom, it could be real, even if it was only for a little while. Depressing reality would be here soon enough. With the feel and taste of Jake on her lips, she was going to pretend she believed in happily ever afters.

Chapter 3

Jake woke up feeling terrible. He’d slept badly for some reason. Tossed and turned most of the night, his brain churning, refusing to settle. He blinked a couple of times, his eyes feeling tired and crusty. He rolled over and looked at the clock. Nine sixteen. Shit, Mama was going to have a fit.

He climbed out of bed, kicking himself free from the tangle of blankets. A quick shower, and then he was headed downstairs. He hit the ground floor and caught a whiff of bacon frying. His stomach rumbled really loud. He rubbed a hand over it and made his way into the kitchen.

Olivia, who was sitting in her highchair next to the kitchen table, squealed and lifted her free hand toward him. In her other hand she held a very soggy and gummy looking piece of pancake.

“Good morning.” Mama stood at the stove, a spatula in her hand.

He walked over and kissed the top of Olivia’s head, her soft, dark curls tickling his nose. She reached for him with her sticky hand, but he managed to side step at the last second. He walked over to Mama and gave her a peck on the cheek. “Good morning.”

“I wasn’t sure you were going to make it this morning.” She flipped a pancake out of the pan and onto the stack next to her and then turned off the burner.

He snatched a piece of bacon off the other plate on the counter. She smacked the back of his hand, the gesture more playful than anything. “You could have woken me up, Mama.”

“You looked so peaceful, I couldn’t bring myself to do it.” She picked up the plates of food and took them over to the table. Olivia made another squealing noise and gummed up her piece of pancake. Mama smiled and scrunched up her face in a playful manner, blowing the baby a kiss.

“Where’s everyone else?” Jake pulled out a chair and waited for Mama to sit in it. Then he sat down himself. Normally, Sunday breakfast was a rather large affair. Given that Jake had four older brothers, it wasn’t a huge surprise. After Mama got back from the early church service, where she always took Olivia so all the ladies in her church group could ooh and ahh over the baby, she always made a feast, and usually everyone gathered to eat and catch up and all of that.

“Mason and Grace headed back to Maryland on Friday to finalize the sale of his townhouse and won’t be back until tomorrow. A couple of the heifers are showing signs of illness, so Owen and Simon are in the process of setting up a quarantine, just to be safe. And Declan’s on duty today, so it’s just us.”