Page 364 of Coal Hearts

The fall from earning her gratitude to being reminded of her hate fucking eviscerated me.

Wiping my mouth with a shaking hand, I struggled.

Fucking struggled with existing.

In that single second, every emotion I’d ever been denied suffocated me like toxic oil.

I shouldn’t be surprised.

It shouldn’t even hurt.

After a lifetime of being denied love, I’d grown rather used to it.

But now?

Fuck, now?

I didn’t know what to feel.

Only that I felt everything.

Every emotion.

All of them.

Craving and confusion, admiration and anger, disgust and despair. Horror, relief, grief—too many. Far, far too many.

Swooping into her, I grabbed her by the hips. “If I have to drag you before a priest and force you to say some binding words to make you believe my pledge to you, then so be it.”

She squeaked as my fingers kept squeezing.

The bones in my wrists ached.

My knuckles turned white.

I couldn’t unbury myself from the avalanche of feeling after feeling after feeling.

I’d never had someone to care about before. Never had a reason to hate if my loved one was threatened. Never suffered jealousy. Never learned how violently my heart would revolt at the thought of losing what was mine.

My fingernails dug into her.

Fury spilled like poison.

She’s mine.

And they tried to take her from me.

That made me feel...

God, how does that make me feel?

Furious. Possessive. But...beneath all those self-serving, selfish rages, another one lurked. One that came with excruciating pain and screeched with absolute warning.

Sour sickness crawled up my throat.

Sickness I never wanted to suffer again.

Fuck!