Page 260 of Coal Hearts

I couldn’t fully remember.

Didn’t want to remember.

The crack inside me had been enough.

The release of all those hot, painful daggers behind my eyes and the churning, heart wrenching grief inside me.

I’d held back the tears for as long as I could.

But when I broke? Well...

I shrugged. “I’m sorry for the scene I caused.”

Shaking his head, he gave me a soft smile and cupped my shoulder. “I’m not. It was a relief to have you let it out. To have you purge what happened.”

I flinched as images erupted.

Henri.

His knife.

His cuts.

His tongue...

I recoiled from Peter’s hand, cupping my breasts and shifting my legs to hide the very part of me Henri had taken without consent.

How could I forget even for a moment?

How had my mind pushed it away long enough for Peter to remind me?

The awful thing was, I didn’t need reminding.

Last night was a part of me.

It’d changed me on a cellular level.

And I had no idea who I was now that it was over.

I shuddered as more images returned.

The breaking, the bleeding...

The shallow cuts on my body would heal, but my heart never would.

Devastated didn’t come close to how I felt. Betrayed? Of course. Confused? Definitely.

But guilt curdled most of all.

He’d asked me not to fight him, and I’d fought.

He’d begged me to remember our promise, and I’d forgotten.

I couldn’t forgive what he’d done, but I couldn’t lay the blame entirely at his feet either.

Peter dropped his hand and stiffened. “You’re thinking about him.”

I looked up and met his soulful brown eyes. “W-We had a deal...and...I broke it.”