Page 38 of The Shadow Sanctum

“You know it’s funny; you mentioned I have a problem with two Keepers, but you’ve only named one.”

I fold my hands on the countertop and hold his gaze, my silence all the answer he needs. Aiden will have to forgive me for what he doesn’t understand. If I could kill my father and save us both, I would do it without blinking.

But killing my father is killing the Shadow Sanctum. I once considered him the heart of my home, but in reality, he’s a virus. You can’t shoot a virus—lest you shoot the host.

You have to be strategic.

His smile widens. “Really, Luna? You?” He laughs like I didn’t betray him. Like I didn’t betray anyone.

Because he doesn’t care. Not about them. Not about our people.

“Aren’t you supposed to be cold-blooded?"

I lift my shoulders in a deep shrug. “I don’t know, Father… Is that what you want me to be?”

Silence seems to weigh on his lips, pushing his smile down.

“Nearly all my life, all I ever aspired to be was you,” I say, keeping emotion from my voice. Because yes, he does want me cold-blooded. It’s what he taught me to be.

“I allowed you to teach me that strength was unyielding and merciless, but recently, I’ve discovered your actions don’t align… You’ve been sparing the baby boys, selling them to new homes instead of allowing mother nature to decide their fate. You’ve been playing god.”

Father’s eyes jump to the entryway as his arms uncross. He glances up at the ceiling where the camera is.

Taking my arm, he yanks me off the stool. “Let’s take a walk.”

He pulls me by the arm all the way outside, only letting go once the cloudy sky casts itself above us. It’s going to storm soon.

We walk off the path toward the forest, Father’s strides long and eager. I wonder if he’d be so anxious if he knew all the Nurturers were aware of his transgressions.

Finally, he spins to face me. “Have you told anyone about this?”

My face hard and blank, I shake my head.

“Has Aiden? Other than you?”

Again, I shake my head. “He told me in confidence when I was overwhelmed with guilt for what I’d done.” I take a deep breath and force my lips into a frown. “You were right about bringing women here… It was a mistake that could’ve cost us, and now that I know about the babies, I understand the risks better. But still, our guests were innocent, and I felt awful about killing them. Aiden told me about the mercy you grant to the infants, and in a moment of weakness, I decided freeing the women was the right thing to do. I ordered Aiden to carry it out.”

A moment of weakness.

I mean it when I say the words. Every moment I spend with Sawyer Hansley is a moment of weakness.

But for some reason, when they come from my mouth, they feel untrue.

The lines in Father’s face smooth as he exhales, as if relieved I view his actions as mercy instead of the putrid greed they are.

I’m not opposed to sparing infants. I’ve never been opposed. That’s why I’ve never stopped Sawyer from sneaking the little things off to the hospital.

But I’m opposed to selling them.

And I’m not blind to Father’s motives.

Father steps close and puts a hand on my shoulder. “Everyone makes mistakes, Luna… I know I haven’t allowed you many, but…” He sighs. “No one escaped. No harm came to us… If you can forgive me for what I’ve kept from you, I can forgive you for your one transgression.”

“Thank you, Father,” I say, pushing my pitch higher as I lay my hand on his fleece-covered chest.

You should call him Daddy.

My core sucks deep into my body as I close my eyes and let my face twist with regret—real regret. It’s so much easier when I don’t have to fake it.