Page 35 of Love, Lies, and Whiskey

Lucas breathed harder. “Did he really have his bodyguards beat up Seeley?”

She nodded, emotions stacking up inside her. “Yes, that’s what Seeley said, and I believe him.”

His jaw tensed, and his fingers stopped drumming. “Is Seeley the reason we moved here?”

“No. I moved to California because I was forced to, and it never really felt like home. Not the way this house does.” Or the ranch did. “I was honest with you about how much I missed Grandma Hazel. She was the only person who was always on my side, and I wanted to feel closer to her. When she left us this property, it felt like a sign. I didn’t think we’d run into Seeley. He doesn’t live in Weston. He lives in Hope Valley.”

He stared at her for a long moment. “If we hadn’t run into him, would you ever have told me the truth?”

She gripped the edge of the mattress tighter. “I wish I could say yes, but I don’t know for sure. Maybe not.”

His jaw clenched, and he looked away again.

“Lucas, try to see things from my perspective. It wasn’t easy keeping that secret from you. There were so many times when I’d look at you and think about how much you looked like or acted like Seeley. But I didn’t think he wanted us.”

“I get it,” he snapped.

“Do you?” she asked sharply. “Because I’m going to be brutally honest about something else right now that I think you need to know. As treacherously hard as this is for all of us, now that I know the truth about my father and the truth about Seeley, I’m relieved that it’s all out in the open. It was torture lying to you. I have lived half my life thinking Seeley didn’t love me the way he said he did and believing he didn’t want you.”

Her chest constricted, and she struggled to regain control. “Honey, you are my heart and soul, and thinking your biological father didn’t want you killed me every time I thought about it, which was all the time.”

He looked away, his lips twitching into a frown the way they had when he was little and on the verge of crying. His arms tightened across his chest. “This sucks. I hate it.”

Tears welled in her eyes. “I know. I’m sorry. I hate it, too.”

“Everything I thought I knew about our family feels like it was all a lie. Seeley said you weren’t in love with Dad. Is that true?”

Oh God, here we go. “I loved your dad, but I wasn’t in love with him, and I know that’s confusing.”

“I’m not stupid. I know there’s a difference, and I’m always going to love Dad.”

“Of course you are, honey, and you should.” She inched forward, aching to take his hand or hug him, but she was afraid he’d push her away and clam up, and she needed him to talk with her. “Nobody wants to take that away from you, and Seeley doesn’t want to replace your dad. He just wants to get to know you and to be in our lives.”

He sat up straighter but looked down at the floor. “What if I don’t want that?”

She felt a fissure forming in her heart at the thought. “Then we’ll talk about it, and if you really don’t want to get to know him, that’s your prerogative.”

That brought his gaze to hers.

“But I think you should give him a chance. He lost both of us through no fault of his own. He only found out about you yesterday, and when I called him tonight to tell him you’d taken off, he didn’t hesitate to help. He brought his family and all those bikers we saw at the hospital over here to look for you. They came with horses and ATVs and trucks and bikes. That’s the kind of person Seeley is, but only you can make the decision to give him a chance or not.”

Lucas looked down again, kicking the bottom of his boot against the hardwood floor. “Do you still love him?”

“I never stopped,” she admitted, more tears brimming. “I’ll always love Seeley. Our love was big. It made you.”

He looked at her with a mix of pain and sorrow. “Are you two getting back together?”

“I think we have bigger things to figure out, don’t you? He and I have to get to know each other again. We’re not the same kids we were, and you come first, Lucas, for both of us.”

“I doubt that’s true for him,” he grumbled.

“I understand why you’d feel that way, but if you decide to give him a chance, I think you’ll see otherwise.” She wiped her eyes and rubbed the dull ache in her temple. “You know what, honey? You don’t have to make that decision tonight. What else would you like to know?”

“Nothing,” he said sullenly.

She felt him shutting down. “Okay, but I want you to know that you can talk to me about how you feel. I’m not going to get mad. You have a right to feel whatever you’re feeling, but I don’t want there to be any more secrets between us.”

“Whatever.”