Page 67 of River Wild

I look at the tree, all packed into the rope and net covering it.

I think he’s right.

“Fudge,” I murmur.

“I think you mean, fuck.”

“No, I definitely meant fudge.” I press my finger to my lips, thinking. I come up with nothing. “What do you think I should do?”

“How the fuck should I know?”

“But you’ve had Christmas trees before.”

He pauses and looks at me. “How come you’ve never had a tree before, if you’re as into Christmas as you say you are?”

Ah.

“Well … I never said I haven’t had one. I just”—I bite my lip—“never had any involvement in buying one or putting one up before.”

He stares at me for a long moment. I entwine my fingers together in front of me.

“Trim it. Or toss it.”

“I’m not tossing it out!” I say, aghast.

“Looks like you’re trimming it then.”

“Yeah.” I sigh.

“You want me to cut the rope off for you?” he asks. “See what you’re working with.”

“Probably best. If I do, I might get buried beneath it.”

He looks at me and then at the tree. “True. Pass me the stand.”

I hand it over to him and watch as he fits the base of the tree into the stand, securing it. Then, he pushes the coffee table, so it’s up against the sofa, trapping Buddy, who’s on the sofa at the moment.

I go over and pick Buddy up, holding him in my arms, getting him out of the way.

River pulls a Swiss Army knife out of the pocket of his jeans. Flicks the knife out and starts to cut the rope on the tree.

I back up as the branches start falling free because … holy fudge knuckles. It’s massive. It spreads out, covering half the sofa and coffee table. It’s hanging over the television. Basically, it takes up half of the room.

Well … hells bells.

“Well … it’s …” I helplessly gesture to it.

“The words you’re looking for are fucking ridiculous. Actually, it reminds me of you.”

“Ridiculous?” I frown.

“Pushy and invasive.” He gives me a look.

Still frowning, I hug Buddy to my chest. “I’m not pushy and invasive.” I’m the least nosy person I know.

“Macy likes you.” He imitates my voice, once again badly.

“You do realize I sound nothing like that?”