Page 123 of River Wild

“Yep.”

“You okay there?”

I lift my head. “Uh-huh, just a stomach cramp.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah. It’s just Braxton Hicks.”

“Oh, the fake labor pains.”

I’m staring at him, surprised. “How do you know what Braxton Hicks is?”

The tips of his ears go red. He’s now looking anywhere but at me. “I might have read about it in a pregnancy book.”

My brows go up. I’m smiling on the inside. “When did you read a pregnancy book?”

“Recently. Anyway, I brought you something—”

His words cut off at the sound of a splash of water.

“Carrie”—his eyes are staring at my feet—“did you just, uh … pee yourself?”

I follow his eyes down to the puddle of water at my feet.

“No.” I shake my head.

“Did your water just break?”

I lift my eyes to his. “Uh, I think so.” I nod dumbly.

“So, I guess now is not the time to tell you I brought you some leeks?” He pulls them out of the brown paper bag he was holding behind his back.

I stare at them. Then, I burst out laughing.

“It’s leek week! And I just leaked!”

River is staring at me like I’ve lost my mind.

“You don’t get it?” I frown. “Olive is a leek this week, and I just … leaked water.” I point down at the amniotic fluid on the floor.

“Oh, I got it all right. I’m just waiting for you to get it.”

“Huh?” I tip my head in confusion.

“That you’re in labor, Red. And, instead of standing here, cracking shit jokes, we should probably be getting you to the hospital.”

Oh.

Jesus H. Christ.

“Hells bells!” I yell. “I’m in labor, River! I’m in labor!” I grab his arms, shaking them, panic filling me. “But it’s too early! I have another two weeks to go!”

“Not according to that puddle on the floor. Looks like Olive is ready to make an entrance.”

“Oh crap. I’m having a baby.” The panic starts to slow to actual realization. “I’m having a baby. An actual real-life baby.” I know my eyes are as wide as saucers right now.

“Really? I had no idea.”