Page 83 of When the Smoke Clears

“And you know him too.” I take a bite of my salad and study her.

“True,” she says with little reaction.

I have so many questions that are none of my business. How did they meet? Where did they go on their dates? What did they talk about? Did they have sex? Was it good?

“Ask me,” Everleigh says as if she’s reading my mind. Wouldn’t that just be my luck? A shrink who can hear my thoughts.

“Ask you what?”

“About Casey.”

“I know Casey. What would I need to ask you?”

“You want to know if we had sex.”

I chuckle and shake my head before taking a bite of salad.

“No?” She cocks her head. “You’re not curious?”

“It’s irrelevant. I’m moving tomorrow.”

“It’s not inherently irrelevant. But it can be a distraction.”

“You’re shrinking me,” I say before drinking my beer.

“Saying something intelligent doesn’t mean I’m shrinking you. Besides, you used to like my intelligence. You found it sexy.”

“I don’t care if you fucked him,” I say in a tone that negates the actual words.

“How many kids does your sister have?” She changes the subject so quickly it makes my head spin.

“Two.”

“Have you imagined having kids of your own?”

“Not recently.”

“Because you’re an old man now?” She likes to poke me in ways I feel certain she would never poke her patients. At least, I hope she doesn’t call her patients old.

“Fun fact: My father was two years older than I am now when he started a family.”

Her eyes widen. “Good for him. How old is your mother?”

I look around the restaurant. “Younger.”

“Younger is not an age. It’s a comparative.”

“I’m aware. How old are your parents?”

“My mom is fifty-five, and my father is, um . . .” She lays her napkin on her lap as our server delivers our food.

“Anything else I can get you?” he asks.

I look at Everleigh, and she shakes her head. “We’re good. Thank you.”

As we eat, I feel her gaze on me, but I don’t look at her, because I’m at a loss for words. Actually, that’s not true. I have lots of words, but they’re irrational.

“Okay.” I grip my knife a little harder than necessary while cutting my steak. “Let’s barter. I’ll give you back your deposit even though you’re planning on breaking your rental agreement. In return, you listen to me. But that’s it. I don’t want you to reply. Take it in like a sponge and hold it until it evaporates.”